Never Give Up - Heidi Lis Page 0,60

you had MY BABY, they would have helped you.”

I can see him struggling but the idea I should have gone to his parents is idiotic I was sixteen…not twenty-one.

“Like hell, boy.” My dad finally speaks again, like he hasn’t done enough damage already.

The tone of his voice, sends shivers down my spine, and the only thing I can do is close my eyes. I halt my next few breaths. It’s like a firecracker was lit under Micah, he’s going to explode. This cycle is getting us nowhere. What’s the point.

“You,” He’s enraged, pointing his finger at my dad. “Shut the hell up! Because of you I never knew I had a baby. You bloody hell should have called my parents. I blame you for this shit.” He’s not done as his attention swings back to me again. “Elsa I’m so pissed at you. I don’t get why you did not go to Matt or my parents. Fuck Elsa, a baby?” One minute he’s furious, outraged, and more upset than I’ve ever seen him. Then, all of a sudden when he’s finished shouting, a look of loss and remorse takes hold with the way his shoulders curl over his chest. He’s conflicted and overwhelmed, that I can understand, but yelling and blaming me is just too much.

God, my patience is running thin hearing the same thing from him.

Matt again tries his best to calm his brother’s manic behavior. “Hey man, getting mad at your girl will not help. You’re angry, and understandably so, but put yourself in her shoes, brother. Don’t forget you left her without her knowing all the facts.” Ah! A voice of reason in this madness.

“She should have been open and honest with mom and dad, Matt. She decided not to, this is on her and her parents. Who gives them the right to make that decision on my part?” Micah’s jerky movements about gives me whiplash. One minute he’s talking with his hands, then he changes direction.

A part of me understands where he is coming from, but I wish he could understand how I feel. I hope after he has time to clear his head, he will. Why am I more understanding than him? The only thing I can think is the fact I’ve lived with this for so long? He’s only had a few minutes, and he never had a chance to have a voice in what happened to his child. The fact he keeps talking like I’m not standing right here though, is pissing me off.

He keeps going between Matt and my parents, back and forth this and that. It’s like I’m watching a ping pong match. Blame is being thrown around, and now Matt is joining in on the blame game. I’m a bystander at the moment, watching this train wreck play out before my eyes. The sad thing is my name is being tossed around in their arguments, it’s like I’m not even around.

Clearing my throat, I want his attention. “I’m right here, look at me Micah,” I edge my way closer to him.

“Not right now Elsa, not right now.” He’s still visibly shaken staring at the ground instead of looking directly at me. I’m not getting anywhere, it seems he’s more interested in this back and forth with my parents.

My dad’s non-stop insulting Micah, with the help of my endearing mother it only upsets Matt more. Which leads to more shouting and yelling between them.

I wonder if they would notice if I left, most likely not. “Screw you all, NONE of you understand what I went through. I’m the one who was pregnant… alone… at sixteen. I had my baby ALONE.”

“Our baby.” He says remorseful.

I have no problem looking Micah in the eyes, but for some reason he has an issue doing the same with me. Too bad.

“Yeah, our baby, but where were you?” I whisper, trying to make my point as calm as I can. His eyes wince but never leave my mine, this time.

No, answer.

I keep going.

“That’s right, not with me. No, you took off, with no more than a few words with why. So why, would I go to your parents? Why, Micah? I had no one. My parents, were embarrassed with their daughter. They were cold, calculated and shipped me off like luggage only to return broken and very much lost. You know what I got when I got home… not a damn thing, no hug, no, I love you’s. I got shit, it was as if it