If he had been Nathaniel or one of the leopards, or even one of the wolves, I'd have hugged him, petted him, but he was Dolph, and I just wasn't sure he was a petting kind of guy.
He just sat there staring blindly at the floor, his big hands limp in his lap. He looked so lost. I got up from the chair and went to stand beside him. He never moved. I touched his shoulder. "I'm so sorry, Dolph."
He nodded. "Lucille cried herself to sleep after Darrin made his little announcement."
"Is it the vampire issue or the no-grandchildren issue?" I asked.
"She says she's too young to be a grandmother, but ..." He looked up suddenly, and what I saw in his eyes was so raw, I wanted to look away. I had to force myself to meet that pained gaze, to hold it and take in everything that he was offering. Dolph was letting me see further inside him than ever before, and I had to honor that. I had to look at him, let him see that I saw it all. If he had been a girlfriend, I'd have hugged him. If he had been most any of my male friends, I'd have hugged him, but he was Dolph, and I just wasn't sure.
He turned his face away, and only then, when he'd given me all the pain in his eyes, did I try to hug him. He didn't let me do it. He stood up, moving away from me. But I'd tried, and that was the best I could do.
When he turned back towards me, his eyes were blank, his face set in that mask he usually wore, his cop face. "If you are holding out on me, Anita, I will bust your ass."
I nodded, my own face falling back into a mask as empty as his. The moment of sharing was over, and he was uncomfortable with it, so we'd go back to familiar ground. Fine with me. I hadn't known what to say anyway. But I'd remember he let me see inside. I'd remember, though I wasn't sure what good it would do either of us.
"A group of shapeshifters, or whatever, attacks me in my own home, kills one of my guests, wounds another, and you'll bust me. What the hell for?"
He shook his head. "You are holding out on me, Anita. Sometimes I think you do it out of habit, sometimes just to be a pain in the ass, but you don't tell me everything anymore."
I shrugged again. "I'm not saying I'm holding out anything about today, but I tell you what I can, Dolph, when I can."
"How about the new boyfriend with the cat eyes?"
I blinked at him. "I don't know what you mean."
"Micah Callahan. I saw him touch you."
"He brushed my hand, Dolph."
He shook his head. "It was the way he touched you, the way your face softened when he did it."
It was my turn to look down. I didn't look up until I was sure I could keep an empty face. "I'm not sure I'd call Micah my boyfriend."
"What would you call him?"
"I appreciate you sharing your personal life with me, Dolph, I really do, but I don't have to return the favor."
His eyes hardened. "What is it with you and the monsters, Anita? Us poor humans not good enough for you?"
"It's none of your business who I date, Dolph."
"I don't mind the dating, but I still don't know how you can stand for them to touch you."
"If it's none of your business who I date, it sure as hell isn't any of your business who I have sex with."
"You fucking Micah Callahan?" he asked.
I met his angry eyes with my own, and said, "Yeah, yeah I am."
He stood trembling in front of me, big hands in fists at his side, and for just a second, I thought he might do something, something violent, something we'd both regret. Then he turned his back on me. "Get out, Anita, just get out."
I started to reach out, to touch him, then let my hand drop. I wanted to apologize, but that would have made it worse. I was uncomfortable with the fact that I had sex with Micah, and that made me touchy. Dolph deserved better. I did the best I could to make up for it. "The heart wants what the heart wants, Dolph. You don't plan on making your life complicated, it just happens, and you don't do it on purpose,