your car. You’re coming home with me.”
“Oh no I’m not. This is my apartment, and I’m staying right here.” I folded my arms and planted my feet stubbornly on the floor.
“You do know you’re standing in a puddle of piss,” Morrison said, glancing down at my feet.
I gritted my teeth against the urge to take off like a bottle rocket, refusing to look down. “Of course I know. You think I just stand around in piss without knowing it? When I’m standing in piss, I fucking stand in it, it’s what I do.”
“And horse apples,” Morrison added.
“What?”
“You’re standing in a puddle of piss and a pile of horse shit.”
At which point, I jumped away screaming like a little girl. Searching the kitchen for something to wipe my shoe on, I settled on the legs still sticking out from under my table. “That is so not okay,” I said, dragging my boot down the length of his jeans. Or its jeans because who the fuck knew, anymore?
Morrison leaned toward the pile I had just catapulted myself from. “What the hell are they feeding that thing? This shit is like...rainbow-colored.”
My eyes widened. Of course it would be. After all, it wasn’t a horse that left it, but a unicorn. “Who knows what the poor thing ate while wandering around the kitchen, you know?”
“Like I said.” Morrison looked at me, and through me at the same time. “There’s plenty you’re not telling me. But this place is uninhabitable and it’s three o’clock in the morning. I’m calling for back-up, and you’re coming with me. Got it?”
Having exhausted all other possibilities after a quick mental review, I had already decided to agree. “Okay, fine. Let me just grab a few things.”
As soon as Morrison migrated toward the living room with his cell phone attached to his ear, I shot into the bathroom.
Wallis was exactly where I’d left him. Only when I looked at him, I saw golden hooves and a rainbow colored mane. “What the fuck was all that about? God, are you lucky he thought you were a horse!”
“Luck has nothing to do with it,” he said. “Only other paranormals can see this goodness. And seeing as you’re a werewolf—”
“Heir,” I corrected. “A werewolf heir.”
“Ohhh. So you mean you and Mark haven’t done the deed yet? Cause if it were up to me, I’d bend you over—”
I grabbed a handful of his rainbow-colored mane and jerked it. “Listen you four-legged shit-stain, there is a detective in my living room calling for back-up, and probably agents from the ASPCA. You had better find a way to get out of here without being seen. In fact, the more people you can get out of here before the cops come, the better.”
“Easy, girl. Wallis will take care of it.” And then he winked at me.
“And you know what else? If there’s anything worse than a perverted unicorn, it’s a perverted unicorn that refers to himself in the third person.”
“Wallis has decided not to take that personally,” he whispered, swatting my ass with his tail.
“Hanna!” Morrison called from the living room. “Let’s go!”
“Just a second! I’m feeding the u—horse a...waffle! He looked hungry.”
“Rather eat your muffin,” Wallis mumbled.
“And I’d rather punch you right in your horseface.” I grabbed a can of shaving gel from the sink and stomped out of the bathroom, slamming the door behind me.
Morrison had cleared a path for me in the living room and had my suitcase in his hand and my carry-on bag slung over his shoulder. “Steve have your cats?” he asked.
“Yep. Took them for a sleepover.”
“Good,” he said. “I’ve always liked that guy. You’ll follow me?”
I gave him a half-hearted salute. “Yes, sir.”
The smile he sent back to me in reply slid right off propriety and into suggestion. “Maybe I’ll think of a few more interesting requests, if you’re feeling so compliant.”
A shiver started at the back of my neck and raced to my knees, leaving a burning trail right through my center.
This was going to be a long night.
Chapter 19
“You’ve made some improvements.” I wandered around the formerly bare living room of Morrison’s townhouse, noting the addition of a credenza topped by a huge flat screen TV, two overstuffed buttery leather couches, and matching end tables.
I mean…the man had end tables topped with two matching lamps.
The last time I’d been here, we’d taken a late night supper sitting across from each other at a coffee table, the only other piece of furniture in the room aside from two Wal-Mart