regretted it. The Paisley thing had been awkward, but it was Hazel who had my insides twisted into a knot.
“Since when does she hate you? You guys were so cute together.”
“We were?”
“Yeah. I know you said you weren’t dating, but when she was with you at the hospital it really seemed like there was something there. Maybe you should have done your questionnaire together.”
“We did.”
She raised her eyebrows. “Then how could she possibly hate you?”
I ran my fingers through my hair again. “I guess she doesn’t really hate me, although I think this is worse.”
“What’s worse than that?”
“She doesn’t want to be friends anymore.”
Molly looked incensed. “Why not?”
I blew out a breath, then explained what had happened last week. How I’d talked to her about our parents and she’d come back with a stack of research studies. How I’d told her I didn’t want to be her latest experiment. And that she’d told me today it had been a mistake to keep sleeping with me, and she couldn’t be friends anymore either.
“I know I shouldn’t have snapped at her. She was just trying to help. But now it’s like she doesn’t even want to see me.”
“That does seem really harsh. And I’m so surprised. You guys really went through your questionnaire?”
“Yeah.”
“The whole thing?”
“From start to finish.”
Her eyebrows drew in and she hesitated for a long moment. “But how is that possible? Your questionnaire brings people together. It really does create intimacy. It works.”
“Not on me.”
“What do you mean?”
I shrugged. “I’m the exception. It doesn’t work on me. That questionnaire is responsible for dozens of people falling in love, but for some reason, I’ve never been one of them.”
“Maybe you just haven’t done it with the right person.”
“I don’t think that’s the problem. I’m the problem.”
“How could you possibly be the problem?”
“Do you want something to eat?” I stood up. “I could go get takeout.”
She pointed at the couch. “Don’t even think about it. Why do you think you’re the problem?”
I sat down again. “I don’t know. Maybe all the numbers and calculations and stupid animal facts take up too much space in my brain. There isn’t room left for other skills.”
“That’s ridiculous. There’s room left to love someone.”
“Look, I don’t understand it either. I’m just not built for it, I guess.”
She tilted her head, her expression full of sympathy. “Corban, everyone is built to be loved.”
“Yeah, well…” I trailed off, glancing away.
“Why did you create that questionnaire?”
I was surprised by her question, but I answered anyway. “When we were testing the algorithms for the dating app, I saw people making snap decisions about potential matches. Passing on someone in an instant with almost no information about them. I wanted to see if there was a better way to bring people together.”
“Yeah, I know this story. You did that thing you do where you learn everything there is to know about something. You did a bunch of research and gathered data. You tested it and refined it and along the way, you became a cute little scientific matchmaker. I know all that. I’m one of your success stories. But that’s not what I’m asking. Why did this fascinate you so much that you poured everything you have into it?”
I stood up again and started pacing around the room, suddenly too restless to sit still. “Did you know that I went out with Bethany Sanderson in high school?”
“No, when did you go out with Bethany? And what does she have to do with it?”
“Just stay with me. It was senior year. I took her out on one date and when I dropped her off at home, she told me she just wanted to be friends and made me promise I wouldn’t tell anyone we’d gone out.”
“Oh my god.”
“Do you know how many girls I’ve dated who’ve basically done the same thing? Maybe not the part about keeping it a secret, that was particularly shitty. But that date with Bethany Sanderson is the story of my life. I meet someone and maybe we like each other enough to date for a while, but eventually it always comes back to that. We should just be friends.”
“Oh, twinkie.”
I kept wandering around the room as I talked. “I’ve never even had a huge breakup. Which is a weird thing to be disappointed about, I know. But no one’s ever felt strongly enough about me for it to end badly. Or to show up at my door asking for another chance. Or run into me a year