but she wasn’t seeing his daughter. Clarissa was lost in memories and pain and something more.
Finally, she turned back to him and pulled her hand away. “I’ll be okay.’
“You need to talk to someone.”
“I’ll be okay, Jed. I get that you’re the town hero, the guy who everyone loves. But you can’t fix this, okay? You can’t save me. Just...forget it.”
Jed knew he should leave it, quit trying. Clarissa was too upset and she was pushing him away intentionally, but he couldn’t.
“I’m no hero, Clarissa. And I’m not interested in fixing you. God’s the one in the saving business. What I am is a guy doing his best to be a friend to someone who desperately needs a friend right now.”
“Daddy, Clarissa watch me!” Mack stood behind bars in the upper deck of the slide and she waited for them both to give her their full attention then flung herself down the slide backwards, landing with a roll and smiling like she’d won the kiddie rodeo.
He clapped and Clarissa did, too, but her heart wasn’t in it, and even Mack could tell that.
His daughter sent him a worried glance, and he pointed to his watch. “One more go, Mack, then we’ve got to get back to the ranch.”
Maybe it was time to start separating Mack from Clarissa. Maybe he’d misjudged what he’d thought was God’s prompting.
Clarissa asked Jed to make her apologies to Paul and Susie, but she was tired and there was no way she could spend time with the family watching them so happy and content together.
Plus she wanted to fall into Jed’s arms and cry and tell him everything and that would be a mistake. She needed to push it all back in the depths of her brain, forget and go on. One foot in front of the other, one day at a time, depending on herself and no one else.
She almost made it to the bunkhouse but a full laugh she knew too well caught her attention. Tammy Jo. And Paul Dillon. Standing outside the stables looking way too chummy.
Her heart caught. No way, Tammy Jo. No way. As she marched toward them Clarissa heard Tammy gasp and Paul murmured something about special promises.
Clarissa’s heart thundered in her ears. She should’ve insisted the sheriff take Tammy Jo back to Stearns. Should’ve put her on the first bus out of town. Should have left town with her if that’s what it took.
Clarissa’s mother saw her first. But she didn’t jump away from Jed’s father in guilt, she just kept on smiling and called out, “Come over here, Clarissa. It’s miraculous.”
Confusion hit her first. And then skepticism. Tammy didn’t do anything without ulterior motives. But her voice sounded so normal. She trudged the last few steps up the path to the clearing and fence. And there she saw what her mother was so enchanted with.
A baby horse standing next to its mother.
“Her name’s Sugar.”
Her mother said the name with awe. And her face was different, too. It was like a single day on the ranch had done something. Scrubbed her clean. Turned her into someone different...someone who really did look at baby horses with wonder and awe. Someone who laughed with a man without anything more in mind.
“She’s beautiful,” Clarissa whispered because she couldn’t seem to make her voice work normally in this moment.
As awe inspiring as the baby horse was, Clarissa couldn’t believe she was actually jealous of her mother right now.
“Paul, thank you so much,” Tammy put her hand on Jed’s father’s arm, and, suddenly, Clarissa saw clearly. Her mother hadn’t changed at all.
“Mr. Dillon, I appreciate everything you’ve done for us. Momma and I have a lot to catch up on.”
Paul’s eyes twinkled as he looked at her, and she saw he completely understood what was going on. “Why don’t I go on back up to the house and let you and your momma talk here.”
With that he started up the the hill to the house. A little hitch in his walk, but nothing too worrisome since he had his cane. He’d be offended if she tried to help him. So she waited until he was almost to the house then turned on her mother.
“Don’t even think about it.”
“I deserve that, I suppose.” Tammy looked away.
Clarissa refused to back down, refused to feel guilty about the accusation.
“Paul Dillon is a good man who opened his home to me and he’s allowed you to stay here as long as you’re willing to work. Don’t ruin this.