nerve ending sparked, a painful sort of burn that could only be alleviated by indulging in this. In her.
“I’m sorry. I really am.” Forced out through shallow breaths, her words were raspy. They destroyed the meager restraint I’d been clinging to. I palmed her neck, caressing the line of her jaw with my thumb. Her chest heaved, and she rested her head against the wall, an unspoken question lingering in her eyes.
Resolve was a fragile thing. One moment it was there, and the next, it was wrecked by the simplest of looks. She was too much and not enough. In one rash moment, I tossed my drink to the side and pulled her face to mine. She moaned against my lips over the shattering of the glass, and her own tumbler crashed against the floor, spattering drops of amber liquid.
She melted into me, and everything that was Leena was suddenly mine. The feel of her breasts pressed flush against my chest. Her tongue twirling with mine. Her lips forming a language I so desperately wanted to learn. To keep private between us. Pressing her harder against the wall, I abandoned her mouth for her neck, trailing my way toward her collarbone, nipping skin and teasing flesh as I went.
“Noc.” Her breathless exclamation killed me. The taste of her skin, the feel of her body—my wildest imagination couldn’t have done her justice. How long had I longed to touch her? Feel her? I dug my fingers tighter into the soft curves of her hips.
She was trapped beneath me, and she did everything she could to encourage it. Slipping her hands under my tunic, she raked nails along my skin, exploring every inch and leaving a delicious sting in her wake.
Moaning into my ear and completely drowning out the sounds of the night, she clutched my back and anchored herself there. The weight of her against me sent a thrill through my spine. Pausing for a moment, I moved away from the swelling red mark on her neck. She let out an exasperated, defeated whimper, and satisfaction brewed in the pit of my stomach.
“What do you want, Leena?”
She leveled me with her heavy-lidded gaze and moved one hand to the side of my face. A wry smile captured her lips. “Isn’t it obvious?”
But gods, I wanted to hear her say it. “Tell me.”
“I want you.”
And even though it was everything I craved to hear, it was the very thing that gave me pause. A selfish, reckless part of me begged to give her what she so obviously desired. But I’d listened to that voice before. It hadn’t ended well. Achingly slow, I brushed my lips against hers. “I can’t do this…”
Her breath hitched. “Why…?”
“It’s not that I don’t want to. Gods, Leena. I want to.” I trailed my hand along the curve of her side. “You have no idea how badly I want to.” I desperately needed to wrap myself in her scent, to have her on me, so when she left, I could taste her for days to come. But I couldn’t give her what we both truly desired—not as I was.
Skirting my fingers along her thighs, I moved beneath the hemline of her loose dress and cursed under my breath. Yanked my hand back. I wasn’t sure I trusted myself enough to be careful. Her life was more important than this.
Slowly, I took a step back.
The space between us cut like a blade, and she winced. “If you want to, then why do you keep pulling away? Is it me? Did I do something? I know you’re upset about the Myad, but—”
“It’s not about the Myad.” This wasn’t her fault, not in the slightest. She was innocent in this, and if she started to blame herself for my actions… I couldn’t live with that. She deserved better.
She deserved the truth.
Sinking to the edge of the bed, I gripped the back of my neck. I’d kept this secret for so long. It was too hard to explain. Curses, while not unheard of, were rare. Explaining that my detachment was necessary to protect others always sounded like an excuse. Far-fetched and unbelievable. The only thing that confirmed it would be their failing health, and I wasn’t willing to put anyone in harm’s way for the sake of proving a point.
“I think it’s time we talked.”
Her gaze narrowed, but she didn’t move for the door or shout at me for leaving her high and dry. Again. I had her for the moment, and