get it, okay? I know what everyone sees and they all pretend like it’s not there. Like it’s just too fucking awful to say out loud.”
I stood there, unsure how to respond to the hurt that was pouring out of her. She was always so effervescent, I never thought I would see her cry like this, ever.
She ran her fingers through her thick red curls and pushed her hair back and turned to face me. “I know what I look like. I know I’ll never dance in this city professionally or anywhere because this is all that matters,” she said through tears. “And I know no guy will ever want me, because there will always be someone out there who doesn’t have this on her face.” She jabbed a finger at the side of her face with the damage.
I felt like the biggest piece of scum on earth at that moment. I thought she was beautiful, so the thought never occurred to me that she might think I left because of her scars. I wasn’t blind, I saw them all along, but they were just as much a part of her as her hazel eyes, her cute nose, her freckles, her elegant gait, her smile. While I saw the scars like everyone else, I could see things other people couldn’t see. I could see the secret beauty Bird possessed, only visible to someone like me, who lived beyond the mere five senses most others possessed.
She was a literal star, beaming with light, walking on the earth, gracing it with her presence. She was the thing we stared up at in the night sky, making us wonder about endless possibilities. She was the light we reached out to grasp, but were never able to touch. That’s what Bird was: A fallen star. A dancing star.
I thought she knew that. I thought that’s why she radiated. I never thought she might for a second think she was anything less than perfection. In that moment, I only wanted to make her feel better. I didn’t care about keeping my feelings under lockdown, I didn’t care about losing control.
I walked up to her and placed my hand on her arm, gripping it. “You think that’s why I left?”
“I don’t need you to lie to me. I’ve heard everything you could possibly think of. And I don’t want your pity.”
“Good, because you’re not going to get it,” I said.
She started a bit, not expecting for me to be harsh.
“Because what I am about to tell you is the truth. I want you to understand that.” And now I found myself a little angry, at the world for making her feel this way, at her for believing them, and at myself for never telling her how I saw her. I dug my fingers even deeper into her thin arm. “I watched you for months thinking any guy would be the luckiest guy in the world to have you. I watched you glow and laugh. I watched your smile and your bright hair that burns red like a wildfire. You are rare, you are beautiful, you are exquisite. You walk around with aura all day and you don’t even fucking know it.” My other hand grabbed her other arm. I was pulling her in and I didn’t even realize it. “You transcend. You are the brightest thing in my world. There isn’t a light show on earth that is as bright and colorful as you when you laugh. On a cool night, when I am alone out there, I can think of you and feel like I have a warm blanket enveloping me. Scars don’t destroy that type of beauty, they amplify it. And even if I wasn’t blessed to see the physical embodiment of your soul, you are still gorgeous. Your long hair, the round tip of your button nose, your freckles, your eyes, your lips . . .” My thoughts drifted back to our kiss. I had never felt lips like hers. I had no idea what I was missing until I kissed those lips. “Your legs, your arms, your ass, your breasts, the way you move. You’re sexy as hell and you’re cute as hell too, dammit.”
I was ranting, and I didn’t give a fuck.
“And that’s the truth, Bird. No pity. Not an ounce.”
I looked down and realized I was squeezing her in my hands, not threateningly, but passionately. We were close, and I was feeling the heat. Neon dashes of green, yellow, and