further infuriate me, but now, looking at my k’vani lie there like a pleasure station whore, I understand them in a new light.
Her inexplicable emotions. Her unnecessary affections. Her never-heard-of love.
That was what made Ki’Ra my Ki’Ra. What I liked the most about her.
But now she lies broken, sadness radiating off her prone body, like a disease.
One, I have given her.
I have done this to her, I realize with a start. I would give my k’vani any luxury she desires, but I have turned her into this emotionless husk. Broken her hu’man spirit to the point where she has become an empty vessel.
I touch the skin above my hearts at the sight of her, another unfamiliar feeling seizing my vital organs.
I cannot…cannot quell her again as I did last night. I know that, even as I turn to leave her alone in the room.
However, there is another thing I know I cannot do, and the certainty of that knowing rocks me to my very core.
I cannot let her go.
Somehow, some way, I must make this right.
18
Kira
He’s back.
I’m not sure how much time passed between when the door slides closed behind my Kel, and when it whispers open again. But I’m still awake.
All I’ve been doing is staring at the same wall I was forced to face last night when he brought me to heel. Too tired to fight anymore. Too weary to sleep.
I’ve decided to stop loving him, but his presence still fills the room. Still makes every atom in my body vibrate with the instinct to turn and face him. Stupid body. Stupid human.
“Ki’Ra,” he says in that way of his, putting so much space between the syllables, that the translator makes them sound like two separate words.
I don’t respond. I force myself to keep lying there.
I get maybe five more seconds to play that game.
That’s how long it takes him to cross the room and pull me into a seated position, so that I’m facing him. “There is something I must say to you. You will listen now to my words. All of my words.”
Yes, of course, I will. After all, he’s the alien overlord and I’m just the human underling. But…too tired to fight.
I just sit there waiting for the next inevitable threat.
His ridges ripple in a strange, stuttering way I’ve never seen before. Then, instead of pinning me with his imperious red gaze as he usually does before he makes a proclamation, he looks down.
“There has never been a time when I did not know I would become Kel. From the moment I could understand words, everyone I came into contact with, my father, the court, servants, soldiers, and even my friends impressed upon me the gravity of my position. My birthright has not allowed me to be anything but the Xalthurian sitting before you today.”
He lets out a hissing sigh. “As Tel I had to do better, be better than those who followed me. I had the weight of my people on my shoulders. To falter or fail was a sign of weakness I could not afford.”
I sit all the way up, already completely fascinated by his story.
“Weakness is not a desired attribute among my people, particularly in our males, though some leeway is given to our females. Sudden outbursts of emotion are frowned upon and during my warrior training we were often instructed to severely beat any male who dared to engage in a show of weak temperament, no matter their standing. I am both a royal and a warrior. I have never been beaten. As Kel, I must be precise in my decisions and put my people’s welfare before all else. Xalthuria first. Even before my own wants and needs.”
He’s still not looking at me, and I wonder out loud, “Why are you telling me this?”
He pauses, and I sense a struggle within him, before he starts talking again.
“I have always known my place in this world. I had never even thought to stray from my path. That is until I met a fiery hu’man female…”
He finally looks up at me, his ridges vibrating. “One who challenged and defied me in a way that no one else had ever dared. It was only a moment. A bare sliver of an hour. Yet I found myself obsessing over her for two entire solars. I could barely sleep for all the time I spent plotting my conquest of her. And I planned to work her poison out of my system, during the little time the