palms. My heart pounds in my chest and echoes in my ears, drowning out the sound of the jets of water as they crash into the tiles. Despite that, despite the nervousness that dances in the pit of my stomach, I slip my hands lower. As the tips of my fingers brush against his tidy pubic area, he grabs my wrists in one hand, stopping me from stirring his penis from its slumber.
Not that I even have to touch it to rouse it. The thought of me wanting to, the feel of my skin so close to it, seems to be enough. In seconds, it eagerly presses against my arm.
“Some might say taking advantage of a woman under the influence is inappropriate,” he murmurs, bending the arm he holds beside my head at the elbow.
His mouth is close…so close I could flick my tongue out and lick it. My brain whirls in my skull and I have never felt so confident—so empowered.
“What do you say?”
He glances at my mouth. “I’m contemplating your vulnerability at the moment.”
The steam in the air is heavy in my lungs and it’s hard to breathe.
“And do I look vulnerable to you?” I ask, licking a rogue drop of water as it rolls over my top lip. “Am I too intoxicated for you to play with?”
God, I hope not.
“I…” His words evaporate on his tongue, leaving him speechless. Maybe I’m not the vulnerable one. Maybe, for once, I am the wolf and he is the sheep.
I push off the wall and he frees my wrists. He tries to pull back, but I snag his thumb and tug his hand forward, planting it on my lower back. I hold him in place, slipping my arm around his neck. Kade clenches his jaw on and off, on and off, and his display of uncertainty makes my blood hum. I lift myself on the tips of my toes and his body tightens, turning to stone. I close my eyes.
“Twenty-seven,” he mutters as our lips graze.
My head feels as though it’s too big for my body and every tumble my brain takes threatens to throw it off balance. “Twenty-seven what?”
“I’ve killed twenty-seven people in total.”
My stomach sinks and I open my eyes. In his stare, I’m not sure what I see. It’s not pride, but it’s certainly not remorse either.
“Why are you telling me this?”
“Because I want you to know the kind of person you’re marrying.”
“I know what kind of person you are.”
“Then you should also know that number isn’t going to stay dormant. It’ll go up. It’ll double. It’ll triple.”
With a war just on the horizon, I don’t doubt it. However, something deep down in my soul tells me he’s not talking about war. I ignore it.
“And so will mine,” I admit, gliding my hand across his forearm and up his bicep. The light, careless feeling floating around my body becomes dense. Less floating, more sinking. “But we do what we have to do…for the greater good.”
Kade grimaces. “The greater good? What does that mean anymore?”
“I don’t know.” I shrug. “But it’s all I’ve got.”
Silence falls. Only the sound of the water as it blasts the tiles fills the room. I don’t know how long we look at each other. Maybe lunch has passed? Maybe it’s time for dinner?
“Why did you agree to marry me?” he asks, pulling me from meaningless thoughts with a question I’ve never contemplated.
“Why did I agree to marry you?”
“Yes.”
If I’m being honest, I agreed to marry him so he’d let me continue my thing with Oliver. I was raised an Unfortunate; marriage doesn’t have the same effect on me like it does Kade. It’s meaningless. It’s something I never built up in my mind, but he has…and I guess I exploited that.
I am dedicated to him, though. I’ll gladly spend the rest of my life with him and if marriage makes him feel secure then I am all for it. On a deeper level, I agreed to marry him because…well…
“You’re the only thing in this world that is truly mine,” I tell him. “Everything I own now I was given, but you? I worked hard for your affection.”
Without warning, he kisses me.
Hard.
So hard I lose my footing.
Catching me, he takes a powerful step forward and crushes me between the cold, wet tiles and his warm, hard body.
Where I belong.
Chapter Fifteen
Kade
Kade didn’t mean to be rough with her, but he couldn’t help it. His body, his passion, was propelled by a desire he couldn’t ignore.