of duty to take care of one screwed-up boy set adrift. You’re thoughtful in so many ways, but you’re afraid to be seen as nice, so you tell me you’re an asshole.”
My stare out the window only increased in intensity, my brow furrowing as something in my chest tensed up. Some Doms would have had him on his knees already for the impertinence, but I didn’t want to stop him.
“I… maybe that’s what most Daddies are like. God knows I don’t know,” Slate added, his voice finally wavering as he forced a quick laugh. “And I don’t know what I’m supposed to do as your boy. All I know is how to kneel and take it and beg for things I don’t get.”
I looked at him quickly, but he didn’t show any signs of being upset. Just determined to unpick me like a puzzle. And I couldn’t decide if he deserved to or not, but we were way past that point.
“But I want to know what you’re like,” Slate said, his voice soft. “You made it seem like this wasn’t it between us. But before there’s a next time, I need to know you.”
You really don’t, I thought, my heart pounding against my rib cage. You just need to kneel and take what I give you. Yield to me, and let me run this show.
But damn it, Slate was right. I couldn’t run any longer from it. I’d been hiding everything but the slick exterior I wanted him to see, and if this was going to last for longer than one unforgettable weekend, I had to be real with him, too.
Slate put his glass aside and took my hand, drawing my gaze to his. The deep brown of his eyes caught me, wide and trusting as always. “What should I know?”
A few seconds ticked by as I studied him and tried to unpick the whirling dervish in my head. But I was captivated by that look, and no closer to any answers when I started to speak.
“I met these assholes in college. Didn’t know they were assholes, at first. My friends. Worked my ass off with them after we graduated. We started a car-sharing app. It’s not big yet, but it’s worth a lot of money. Investors and everything. They did the tech and finance stuff. I cracked the whip.” I managed a tight smile.
It had been the perfect outlet for me—micromanaging every detail of the startup, keeping those lazy slugs on schedule. Their ideas were solid, but left to their own devices, they would still be in their parents’ spare houses smoking bowls and watching terrible sitcoms.
I was the one who had seen and nurtured their potential, before I even understood what I was doing or why. It had quickly led to me figuring out my own needs, and discovering Dom Nation, and…
Well, it had all seemed perfect. Until it wasn’t.
Slate nodded slightly, his grip on my hands warm and his gaze patient.
Christ, here it came. It wasn’t going to stop now. All I hoped was that he didn’t pity me. How the fuck could I earn his respect—his submission—if he pitied me?
“One day, an investor showed up at Dom Nation. He recognized me. My double life came out. My good old buddies called me a freak and bought me out—hence this place.” I waved around, finally tearing my gaze from the sympathetic creases forming on Slate’s face.
“Shit,” Slate murmured, squeezing my hands.
I shook my head once, briskly. “The real kicker is that I fought them tooth and nail to strengthen our account vetting and add a sexual predator flag we could apply to users. To make it safe. And the day they kicked me out, they flagged my account.” I snorted harshly, dismissive, but I didn’t expect the sting in my chest to be as sharp as it had been that day.
“Assholes,” Slate muttered. “No, that’s not strong enough. Douchecanoes.”
That made a glimmer of a smile pass over my face. I shook my head and finally looked back at him, letting go of his hands and stretching my arms along the back of the couch. “So that’s where the money comes from. I’m not some Mafia boss, don’t worry.”
Slate frowned and nodded, looking uncertain of what to say. “That’s still… I’m sorry.”
“My old business partner called me back tonight about something,” I added and ground my teeth. “God, I wanted to rip him a new one.”
Shut up, Rex. Shut up. Don’t tell him why.
I’d never been so close