down as something to indulge in later.
"We were attacked, evidently by your old friend Pilar. You foolishly threw yourself in front of a bolt meant for me. While I was trying to carry you inside, Pilar attacked again. Finn got the crossbow from him, but couldn't stop him from cracking me a few times with a hunk of wood while I was trying to protect you. He left before Finn could disable him. It's noon now, or else Finn would have been able to track him. Everyone is fine. End of story."
"Oh, not even," I said, my arms still crossed. Paen's eye was almost down to normal, and although he was still covered with blood, at least the gaping cut on his temple had closed up and stopped bleeding. "I have lots of questions, like why Pilar would switch from attacking Clare to you? That question aside - "
"You are absolutely certain it was Pilar? Finn had never seen him before today, and I didn't get a good look before he attacked me," Paen asked, interrupting me.
"Yes, I'm sure it was him, although I didn't get a good look at him since I was too busy trying to shove you out of the way. Back to major confusion - your brother says I'm your Beloved, but we tried those seven steps, and you didn't get your soul back. What changed?"
"You sacrificed yourself for him," Finn said, stealing a kiss from Clare, who was bustling around gathering up bloody cloths. "It's necessary for a Beloved to be willing to sacrifice everything in order to redeem her Dark One's soul."
I narrowed my eyes at Paen. "You left that out of the list of steps."
He shrugged. "I didn't think it was pertinent."
"You didn't think - " My tiny little hairs on the back of my neck hackled up.
He held up a hand to stop the coming diatribe. "I meant that I did not think it was pertinent in the steps to Joining. My father said he hadn't been Joined until Mum offered herself up in his place, but I didn't connect that with us."
"So I was right after all," I said, feeling a warm glow of happiness at the thought of Paen having his soul back.
"Yes, you were right." He avoided looking at me, as if he wanted to hide something.
"Well, don't thank her or anything, brother," Finn said, rolling his eyes. "Talk about ingratitude."
"It's all right, he doesn't have to thank me." I examined his face, looking for some other sign that we were now bound together. There was nothing, no miraculous... something. I had no idea what I was expecting to see, but I felt a strange sense of loss that the indescribable something wasn't there. "I told him I would be happy to help him regain his soul."
"Yes, but - "
"Leave it, Finn," Paen said, shooting a look full of unspoken comment at his brother. "If you're feeling better, Sam, perhaps we can move ahead with our previous plans?"
The sense of something missing heightened. "Sure. Um. Just a second... I'm sorry, I guess I'm a bit more addled than I thought. We're Joined now, right?"
"Yes," Paen said curtly, using one of the damp cloths that Clare left to wipe the blood off his face.
"So I'm... what? I'm a vampire?"
"No, you're a Beloved," Finn answered, smiling when Paen scowled at him. "Someone has to tell her, Paen, and it's clear you're falling down on the job."
"I'm just trying to get a handle on this," I said with a faint apology. "I'm not a vampire, but I'm... what exactly? Still me or different?"
"You're no different than you were with the exception of being immortal," Paen said, tossing the now soiled cloth in the trash.
"Paen, that's not really fair... right. None of my business. You two work it out yourselves," Finn said, holding up his hands when Paen shot him yet another potent glance. "I'll just say this, Sam - there are three sorts of Moravians: Dark Ones, who have no souls until redeemed, Moravian men like me who were born with a soul, and females, who all have souls. Beloveds are more or less the same as female Moravians."
"Ah. Do the women..." I picked up a staple remover and made biting gestures toward my neck.
"Drink blood? They can, but they don't need to in order to live like we need to."
"That sounds rather unfair," Clare said, patting Finn on the arm as she made pouty lips. "All that biting you have to