and refuses to let anyone breach it?"
"Mrs. M., you must not allow yourself these hopes." Amanda tried to take a deep breath, but her lungs seemed squeezed by the enormity of the baby.
Mrs. MacDonald broke down in noisy sobs, hiding her face. "They were such a happy family. I loved those two children as if they were my own."
Amanda looked at the old woman, bowed and defeated. The photos had reminded her too well of the tragedy. Maybe they never should have been unearthed. But a new life was coming, and there was always hope in the renewal of birth. In that moment, Amanda knew she'd just taken on another responsibility.
"Mrs. MacDonald," she said softly. "I hope you have a name for my baby to call you. Something appropriate for a grandmother."
Mrs. MacDonald stared down at her clasped hands. "We never had children," she said. "I don't know why."
A sudden release burst out of Amanda. She looked down at the water dumped on the floor.
"Mrs. MacDonald," she gasped. "I think you're going to become a grandmother today."
Chapter 30
"You weren't kidding," the pink-clad nurse said, "when you told us the contractions were only two to three minutes apart. This baby is going to be born fast."
Amanda focused on the nurse's badge. Gwen. "Where is—the baby's grandmother, Gwen?" Amanda tried to breathe, but she needed Mrs. MacDonald.
"She's on the phone," another voice said from the doorway. A male nurse looked in. Gwen hustled over and walked out of the room, but Amanda could hear them plainly, talking in the doorway.
"Tell grandma to get off the phone," Gwen said. "The baby is going to come any minute."
"Is there anyone else?" the male nurse asked. Really, did he think his voice didn't carry?
"Not that I've seen," Gwen said dryly. "No sign of a father."
Amanda's heart broke. She'd deprived Logan of this moment. Even if he didn't want her, he should have had the right to see his child come into the world.
Then pain spiked in her, and when she'd gotten through it, Mrs. M. was leaning over her, pressing a cool washcloth to her forehead. Gwen leaned over from the other side. "The doctor will be here in a minute. It's time to push."
Amanda didn't want to push. Something was not right. She'd made a huge mistake and she needed to fix it before it couldn't be fixed. But pain was overtaking all else and making her weak. She couldn't think of what she needed to do and so she pushed when they told her to. She tried to rest when she wasn't pushing. The pain continued. Five minutes stretched into ten.
Ten minutes stretched into an hour. Two hours.
"It's too late for an epidural," someone said in a low voice. "She has to keep pushing."
She was so tired. Too tired to be stubborn. Too tired to be proud. Tears leaked out of her eyes as she faced the truth.
She wanted Logan. She wanted him here to comfort her, even though she knew he didn't have the ability to offer comfort.
Her anger and resentment had vaporized. Whether because of Mrs. MacDonald's revelations, or due to the fact that she was so exhausted and emotional, she didn't know. The reason didn't matter. She wanted his calm capability, his straight-eyed gaze, his heated warmth, beside her.
A long moan escaped her.
"I see the baby crowning," a female voice said excitedly.
A commotion sounded at the door, someone arguing, and a deep voice answering.
Amanda opened her eyes in shock. Was she hallucinating? She cast an agonized look at Mrs. MacDonald. But she was afraid to ask anything. She wanted to hang onto this thread of hope for as long as possible.
Logan Winter strode into the room.
His clean pine scent cut through the clotted hospital smells.
"Thank God," Mrs. MacDonald said. "He made it."
Amanda stared, even as her lower body writhed in agony.
Logan grabbed her hand. "You're doing great," he said, his deep voice soothing. "Just a few more minutes."
She held his gaze, as if he held the power of life. "The baby," she whispered. "How is the baby doing?" That's really all she wanted to know, but fear had prevented her from asking.
Logan gave her strength to voice her fear. She didn't know why or how. She just knew it was true.
"The baby is fine," he said with certainty deep in his voice. "You're fine. You've done all the hard work already. Just a little bit more."
Emotion washed through her. Reassurance. Comfort. A tiny kernel of joy. She didn't know why