tragedy seemed so huge she could not stop the tears of fear and loss that streamed down her face. She tried to wipe them away on her sleeve and looked up at the noodle seller, who was sipping hot stock off a spoon, checking its flavour.
“Her name is ShengYue.” The noodle seller looked down, surprised.
“A pretty name. Her mother’s choice for her?”
“No” said TieJuan “she chose it herself, when she sang to the moon.”
“They might change it, in the baby home, unless you tell them. How will they know?” He looked at her kindly and then rummaged through his things. He pulled out a piece of paper, the label from a sack of noodles, which had a fairly clean blank side and the stub of a pencil. “Here– write it for her.”
TieJuan was embarrassed. “I do not know all those characters,” she said. “Do you?”
“I think so. I’ll try.” He licked the tip of the pencil and wrote carefully, his tongue protruding from between his teeth as he formed the shapes.
“There. I think it says ‘my name is ShengYue’” he said as he handed her the paper. She opened the quilt bundle and tucked the paper against ShengYue’s tiny chest.
“Thank you,” she said to the noodle seller, “it will make it easier for me. It is a tiny thing, all I can give her.”
The noodle seller looked thoughtful and said nothing for a moment.
“Her guide looks more upset than they usually do and I’ve seen some,” said the noodle seller’s guide to Mohmi, nodding towards TieJuan’s guide, who was wrapped round TieJuan, stroking her hair and murmuring to her.
“Yes, it’s a slightly different story,” said Mohmi, “TieJuan had agreed in spirit that she would take a life where her baby could die, that she wanted to experience a severe loss. But we discovered recently that we need a baby, so her guide agreed on her behalf that she would give this baby away, rather than let it die. Harder for her, much harder. A dead baby’s story is finished, an absent living one could haunt her always. Her guide feels it will be an even more useful experience for TieJuan, but I think he’s feeling guilty just now, for putting her through this. I’m glad you’re here.”
“We’re always here, or somewhere like this. My man hears me pretty accurately now, he’s such an old soul. He’s just in this life now to help others. It’s fun to watch him, after millennia of having to get him out of tight corners.” The noodle seller’s guide glowed the soft deep purple of a wise old soul and he leant forward to whisper to his human. The noodle seller looked at TieJuan and his crinkled eyes were unnaturally bright. He opened his mouth to speak, closed it and then reconsidered.
“It seems to me that you are giving her more than that. A lot more. Forgive me if I am wrong, but I think you are giving her life. Twice.” He turned back to his pot of bubbling stock and stirred it, avoiding TieJuan’s eyes. She watched, her mind empty.
“In my day, we could have all the children we wanted. I have two daughters and a son,” said the noodle seller. “I love them all.” He scooped up a handful of dry noodles and dropped them into the stock, along with two pieces of chicken. TieJuan watched as the pot bubbled and the noodles rolled to the surface. She watched blankly as he scooped them out and into a bowl which he handed to her. She looked at the noodles and meat in the fragrant broth and thought it was the most wonderful meal she had ever been given. Her hunger overcame her and she ate quickly, draining the bowl and handing it back as she fumbled for her money. The noodle seller waved her hands away.
“No. No charge. It is my gift. And here is some water for later.” He handed her a small plastic bottle. “If you pass later in the day, come back. There are always noodles.” He smiled at her and at the baby. “Goodbye, ShengYue. May you always be as lucky in life as when you chose this mother.” He turned away abruptly and TieJuan found herself thanking his back as he started to deal with his first customers.
TieJuan walked away through the streets. There were more people about now, all busy, pushing this way and that. She had no idea where to go. She walked on, putting some