year, most likely because the site is listed as one of the top fifteen most haunted places in Britain (see editor’s notes for links).
In 2011, Dr. Annabeth Lansing visited the site for the first time in six years. Today, she is a leading paranormal researcher, with a particular expertise on Elmbridge High. Her latest book, The Forgotten Elmbridge, comes out next winter.
To date, she will not speak of what happened during her visit to the site.
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Despite CCTV footage that shows Carly Johnson in the flames of the Elmbridge fire, her body has not been found. Some say she still lingers on the grounds, seeking out the missing half of her soul, Kaitlyn. Others believe she moved on, reuniting with her sister in a better afterlife.
Kaybear? Will you always be here with me? Will you promise?
I promise, Carly-bean. I am not going anywhere.
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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
First, to the people who saved my life and to whom I owe this book’s existence. My dearest friend and husband, who fed me every two hours, traded back rubs for bites of food, came in every morning with a smile even when all seemed hopeless, and who got me to the other side. Thank you forever—I love you, I love you, I love you! My unnamed hero and donor, I think of you daily. This book is for you and those you left behind. Professor John O’Grady, the House MD of the King’s College Liver Department, and his amazing team for their unflinching support. Dr. Agarwal for the smiles and wit! Dr. C. J. Tibbs, for really caring; I hope you know how much you gave me. My talented surgeon and the rest of the King’s surgical team, and to the nurses on Todd Ward—you are angels on this earth, I really hope you know that (but I’ll keep sending chocolates as a reminder!). Without all of you, this book wouldn’t be here. I humbly thank you for giving me my life. To every organ donor out there in the world: Thank you too!
Thank you, endlessly, to my mother, who gave me so much when she forced me to read to her (even through my wailing protestations!). For always believing it would happen and that I had something worth sharing. You are my favorite person in the world and always my biggest cheerleader. You make my world bright and put up with my insanities. I love you, and I’m proud you’re my best friend. You rock the socks off everyone!
To Polly Nolan and Sarah Davies, agents extraordinaire and superwomen, and to the rest of the Greenhouse staff, my deepest thanks for believing in this book and championing it across the oceans. I adore you, I really, really do!
To my editors, Alvina Ling and Jenny Glencross, a huge, massive thank-you for your sage advice and wisdom and for your faith, right from the get-go. For seeing things I couldn’t, and allowing me to bring out the best (and the worst) in Kaitlyn, Carly, Naida, Ari, and the rest of the Dead House gang; for helping me to see the beautiful tragedy of my ending. Jenny—we are twin Harry Potter souls! Alvina—your found-footage Hachette diaries still bring me the greatest joy! To Fiona Kennedy, for your enthusiasm and class. To Nina Douglas, for always providing awesome shenanigans, and to the whole Orion/Indigo team for such an amazing pitch document, which I have framed because it is so beautiful and magnificent! Thank you all for truly understanding The Dead House.
Huge thank-you also to the Little, Brown Books for Young Readers and Orion/Indigo teams and designers. I love you guys so much for bringing so much awesome to young adult literature. Thank you!
To my critique partners and best writerly friends, the YA League—Isabel Sterling and David Purse. You loved The Dead House all the way, and because of that, you loved me. Thank you, thank you, thank you! PS: Scotland, baby! (Our bitchin’ swans will always haunt me!) Huge thanks also to Melissa See, who promised Dead House cake and cosplay.
To my first readers and friends: Patti Rossier, Lauren Charles, Ashley Hartzell, and Ley Saulnier. You are some of the most beautiful, insightful, brilliant people I have ever met, and I’m honored to know you. Ashley, you saved me, girl, and I love you.
To the YA Scream Queens—Courtney Alameda, Jenn Johansson, Lindsay Currie, Trisha Leaver, Hillary Monahan, Lauren Roy, Cat Scully, and Sarah Jude Bromley—for showing me that there is a place for me and my weird brain, and for bringing YA horror to ready and willing readers (including me!). You are queens of the highest order.
A gigantic thank-you to the illimitable Kat Ellis, for the cake, coffee, and chats. I cherish them more than I can say! To my agent sister, Jen Rose Bell, for your enthusiasm, support, and beautiful spirit—I am so glad Polly brought us together! To Neil Jackson, Sarwat Chadda, Tara Kemsley, and Lia Keyes—thank you for the writing retreats! Here’s to so many more.
To my friends, who keep me grounded and happy: my twin and forever chop, Stacey Poulton; my beautiful and kind Mandip Kaur; my Mrs. Moose, Yurena Diaz; the wonderful and cherished Kimia Ahmadi; the lovely Colleen Mulhall; and my personal Viking, James Lidgey-Hutt. To anyone I haven’t mentioned, forgive a frazzled writer—but I love you, I do!
A big thank-you to my beautiful model, Amy! You are a perfect Kaitlyn and just gorgeous!
And you. If you’re reading this book, thank you so much. Words can’t express the honor I feel, knowing that you went on this journey with Kaitlyn too. Thank you.
AUTHOR’S NOTE
The Scottish Mala and Grúndi aspects of this book are fictional, inspired by a childhood of travel and exposure to various cultural, tribal, and religious beliefs. Additionally, the fictional “Fair Island” in the book shouldn’t be confused with Fair Isle, which is a very real, very beautiful island off the coast of Scotland and part of Shetland.
Dissociative identity disorder is a fascinating, complex, and controversial disorder on the dissociative spectrum. The human brain is a magnificent tool, capable of breaking into pieces the conscious part of a person’s mind in order to protect the self from the memory of trauma. In DID (previously known as multiple-personality disorder), this means that at least two distinct personalities exist in one person, with one, or several, of the personalities (the “alters”) holding the memory of trauma away from the core personality so that he or she can function. Kaitlyn Johnson, as described by her (very negligent) doctor, is one such alter. What makes her unique is that she comes out only after dark and that—according to her—she has always been around and isn’t an alter at all, but a natural second half to her “sister.”
Kaitlyn was born during a period of my life when I experienced inversion syndrome (this is when you are awake at night, rather than during the day). During those nights, I began to think about what kind of life someone who had only ever known such darkness would have. What she would be like. How she would behave, how she would (or wouldn’t) associate with other people. And, of course, if there was a dark half to the equation in Kaitlyn, there had to be a light half. From that came Carly, someone who had only ever known warmth, light, and the reality of daily life. How different these two would be!
What might it be like to have control of only half your day? Would you love or resent the person who got the rest of it? Would you communicate with that person? How? What would it feel like not to have control of your own body—or worse, to feel as though your body may not even be yours?
What would it feel like to be told you are a symptom or a disease?
And then came the thought: What happens when the other half of your life is suddenly taken away? And what if someone told you the reason was not psychological (integration), but spiritual (demonic)? How would that feel?
Especially when no one will believe you’re real.
I would like to make a special thank-you to the person in my family who suffers with DID. You are the most intriguing person I know. All of you.
And another special thank-you to the doctors who gave me back control of my body.
This book is for you.