A Crown Of Smoke And Ash - Sloane Murphy Page 0,29
tear rolls down my face, despite me trying to stop it, and a sob catches in my throat. I roll onto my side and curl up into a ball, as I see it, again and again. I can’t catch my breath as the sobs rip through me, and I let them keep coming, knowing I’ve held onto it for too long.
That’s how Levi finds me, curled in a ball, shaking, my tears run dry, but still reliving the moments before he came in. The two weeks before it where I was demeaned and discarded in a way I’ve never known. I felt like less than nothing while I was locked away in there. Let alone the warrior I was told I would be.
The warrior that I was.
I barely notice as he carries me back to my room, that he lays my down on my bed, kissing my forehead. I watch, unseeing, as he turns on the taps to the tub in my bathroom, before rummaging through the bag I bought with me that I still haven't bothered to unpack, and then heads back into the bathroom.
"Come on, Angel," he says softly as he lifts me from the bed, cooing to me like a little bird who might fly away at any sudden movement. He places me on my feet by the tub, and strips my clothes from my body, before undressing himself. He picks me up again, and carries me into the tub, sitting me between his legs in the giant bath.
I inhale and sigh.
Lavender and Lily.
I don't know how he knew, but right now I'm not even going to question it, I'm just going to accept that he's here, and take comfort in that.
"I've got you," he whispers as he runs his hands over my back and shoulders, soft, loving touches. Who would've thought the brute could be so gentle.
I sit, and lose myself in him, focusing on his touches as he washes my body and my hair, keeping my breathing steady.
"Thank you," I croak, sat with my back against his chest, his arms circling me.
"Do you want to tell me what happened?" His voice is so low and soft, it wraps around me like a caress.
"I just, I finally stopped shoving it all down. Everything with the trial, and my family. That they were just going to stand there and let me die. Without even a hint of regret. No-one was going to step in and help me. I thought I was okay, that I'd accepted my fate, but now that I'm still here, now that you saved me, I can't get a grip on how much their actions broke me. I feel like a part of me is lost because of it, and I've been going around like it didn't matter. Like I'm still me, but I don't feel like me. This me, the old me, any of it. I've never felt more lost and confused. I know this is just a road bump, but what they did, I don't know that I'll ever be able to forgive that."
I can feel how much my words affect him. His body going rigid, even as he tries to stay calm for me, but the anger flows from him. "I am sorry that I didn't see it."
I shake my head, but he holds me tighter. "I have always been your anchor in the storm, and I didn't see how bad you were hurting. If I thought it would make you happy, I'd wipe every person who has wronged you from the earth."
I laugh. "That might thin the population a little much."
"I'd still do it, Remy. Regardless of the consequences. Very little means much to me, when you have lived as long as I have, it is hard to hold things dear, but you, I love you, Angel. Have since the moment I saw you. Will until the end of my existence."
I shudder as his words fill a part of the hole inside of me. I tilt my head back and angle up so I can kiss him. He kisses me like there is nothing but us, right here, right now. Soft but demanding. Hot and hungry, yet restrained.
"Come on, let’s get you out of here. The others should be here soon, but they can wait. You need to sleep more than you need to see them." I nod, not fully agreeing, but knowing that he's probably right. I feel exhausted, the last few weeks are finally catching up with me.