I need you for a minute.”
“Sure, Chief.”
I walk inside, and he shuts the door.
“Am I fired already?”
“No.” He laughs and shakes his head. “No, things are going well. I just needed to let you know that I need you next week. Diego is taking the week off, and I have some more training for you.”
“So, no week off.”
“No can do,” he says absently. “But the upside is that the overtime pay doesn’t suck, right?”
“Sure.” I wipe my hand over my face.
“You’ll have tomorrow off, and then I need you back here the following morning, same time as usual.”
“Got it.” I nod and stand, then leave his office and dread the call I’m about to make.
I dial her number and wait for just a second before Natasha answers.
“Hey there,” she says, her voice light for the first time since I left last week. “I’m so glad you called because I’m about to go to the grocery, and I’m going to buy steaks for dinner tomorrow night. Do you want a ribeye or a sirloin?”
“Listen, babe, about that—”
“If you’re not in the mood for steak, I can make something else. Would you rather have lasagna? Kelsey was asking for that the other day.”
“It’s not that. Tash, take a breath and let me get a word in, okay?”
“Sorry.” She giggles. “I’m just excited.”
My heart hurts. “I know. I was too. Look, the chief just pulled me into his office.”
I fill her in on the new development.
“Oh.”
I hear the defeat in her voice and feel like shit.
“I’m sorry. I had no idea.”
“I know. It’s not your fault.” Her voice is hollow. “We’ll just see you next week.”
“Well, that’s my usual week on, so it’ll likely be another two weeks.”
There’s a pause. “Right. Of course.”
“Sweetheart, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be silly.” I hear the tears in her voice. “It’s your job, Sam. These things happen, especially when you’re the new guy. It makes sense they’d want you to fill in for vacations and stuff after you had to wait so long to go out there. They probably had to wait for their time off.”
“Yeah, that’s what I figure, too, but I should have thought of it. I’m an asshole for not realizing.”
“It’s okay.” She clears her throat. “We’ve already made it one week. We just have to do this twice more and you’ll be here. No big deal.”
It’s a big deal. I can hear in her voice that she’s full of shit.
It’s a big fucking deal.
“Tash—”
“Oh, I’ve got another call coming in I have to take. Thanks for letting me know, Sam. Love you.”
She clicks off.
Fuck.
Chapter 19
~Natasha~
“Give me the spoon.” I hold my hand out toward Kevin, but he stares me in the eye with a frown on his adorable little face and then runs away with the utensil. “We have to go to school! Come back here.”
He’s done with his cereal. Why is he running around this house with the spoon? Just to drive me crazy?
Make me cry?
Because I’ve cried more in the past month than I have since Monica died, and that’s saying quite a lot.
“Kevin, if you don’t want me to be homicidal, you’ll put that spoon in the sink and get your damn shoes on so we can walk to school.”
“You’re not supposed to swear,” he yells back.
I take a deep breath.
I don’t feel well. I’ve been chilled and nauseated all morning. I want to crawl into bed and stay under the covers.
But I can’t. I have to walk the kids to school because my car is on the fritz, and the law says they have to attend school.
“Let’s go,” I call back. “Now.”
They know this voice. It’s that of a woman on the edge. And they don’t usually argue when I’ve had to pull it out of my pocket and use it. After what feels like a damn hour, the kids are finally bundled up and ready to go.
The walk to school really isn’t that bad. It’s about four blocks, and the weather is mild today—no wind or snow.
If I didn’t feel like hell, I’d say it’s a nice day.
“I think school is stupid,” Kevin grumbles.
“Extra-stupid,” Kelsey agrees.
They’ve slipped back into being difficult and angry like they were over the summer.
We haven’t seen Sam in a month, and they’re acting out. They miss him.
Hell, I miss him.
But none of us can control his schedule.
Of course, two five-year-olds who already have insecurities from losing their parents don’t understand.
“Okay, be good, do you hear me? I don’t feel well today, you guys. Please