your own choices?”
“Clear, huh?” I huff a humorless laugh. “I don’t think I can do the criminal justice field. I’ve seen more dead bodies, dead kids, and people dead inside from loss. I’m just not cut out for it.”
I don’t mention that I want to stay in Farmington and at the same time keep my distance from Colton, which is impossible because even if I got a job working for the Sheriff’s Department instead of the PD, we’ll still end up crossing paths.
“Then do something different.”
I lift my eyes, glaring at him.
“It’s not that simple. I’m a damn month from graduation, Cannon.” I drop to the floor, pressing my back against the wall. He follows and takes a seat beside me.
“Maybe it is. Have you considered academia?”
“I don’t want to be a teacher.”
“Not even college?”
“And follow in Jasmine’s footsteps?”
“There’s nothing wrong with being a teacher. Cerberus is filled with them. It’s a respectable profession.”
“It’s safe,” I argue. “I want to be a badass.”
He laughs at this, but it’s not in a mocking tone. “If you think I’m going to spew some shit about gender roles, you’re mistaken. Rivet kicks ass as some commando chick and I sit behind a desk, but you can always be a badass teacher, someone who changes people’s lives. You can make a difference.”
“Yeah,” I agree, but I know he’s given me something to think about.
“Now, get off your lazy ass and let’s go lift some weights. You can’t be a badass with such skinny arms.”
Laughing, I follow him downstairs to the weight room with a little portion of the burden lifted from my shoulders.
Chapter 15
Colton
No matter the amount of conviction I had when I told Sophia we could only be in a professional relationship, I regret every word I uttered that day in my office.
There hasn’t been any flirting or secret smiles.
There are no jokes.
There has been no extra time. She arrives within minutes of her responsibilities in the mornings and leaves promptly at five in the evening.
She doesn’t look over her shoulder to make sure she’s doing something right.
She doesn’t sit at my desk and eat lunch.
We don’t argue about opinions on television shows, something we always found middle ground on.
Nope, none of that. It’s all business, all the time.
I haven’t caught her eyes on me or a single salacious look on her pretty face.
I also haven’t caught her talking to the patrol officers either, which has been a blessing. If she ignored me and then turned around and handed her attention so readily to others, I’d probably go insane.
Once again it’s Friday, the weekend looming over me like a dark cloud. In two weeks, she graduates, and that means she only has eight more days in the office. What happens after that is anyone’s guess. That’s a lie. What happens is, she walks away and never looks back. She hasn’t asked Monahan about the police academy or if there were office jobs available. I know because I asked him. She hasn’t mentioned her after-internship plans with me because we hardly talk. If we aren’t discussing a crime scene, her lips are closed.
She’s polite but distant. She’s not rude, but she’s no longer the peppy girl that walked into my office six weeks ago either. Some of her light is gone, and I don’t know if that’s solely because of me or if some of the blame can land at the feet of the cases we’ve been working.
This week has been brutal, but after working all night, the suspect was arrested, a full confession was gained, and another case is closed. Everyone at the station is exhausted, but there are smiles all the way around. Even Sophia’s lips tilt up a little when Monahan congratulates her on the work she’s done. She was instrumental in helping to solve the case, noticing a few discrepancies at the scene on Monday and voicing her opinion about them. Her reasoning was wrong, but it helped get me on the right track, and I wouldn’t have been able to do that if it wasn’t for her.
“So first round on me?” Gaffey asks the room.
Several readily agree, but I already know Sophia’s answer. Each time we close a case, I ask her to dinner to celebrate, and each time she turns me down. She doesn’t even give me an excuse like she did the first two times. Her simple no is all I get these days.
“No thank you,” she says when Gaffey turns his attention to her.
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”