flesh, and hearing Chelsea wasn’t with anyone else, there’s really no doubt. Hopefully, Rowan will understand, and she doesn’t think less of me for something I did years ago. I told her that wasn’t my lifestyle anymore, and I’m ready to prove that, but now I’m worried she’ll think the worst.
I can’t even be that surprised this happened. Riley always warned me that my party life would catch up with me someday. I haven’t been that reckless since I was twenty-one, but it doesn’t change anything now. Once I was promoted to oversee the cattle operation, I realized there was no room for that type of lifestyle anymore. Kicking women out of my bed at four a.m. was no fun when I had to be at work at the butt crack of dawn.
All I’ve wanted since discovering my feelings for Rowan weren’t one-sided and that she had them too was to settle down with one woman and build a family with her someday. I just never imagined it’d be like this. It’s as if the universe gave me an Uno reverse card as soon as things got serious.
Rowan deserves to be more than my best-kept secret, and I want the whole world to know we’re together and that she’s mine. But after she finds out the news of my new reality, she may write me off completely. I’m not sure my heart would ever be able to recover from losing Rowan Bishop, especially when there’s no doubt she’s my past, present, and future.
Chapter Fourteen
ROWAN
I look down at my phone, turn it off, then turn it back on to make sure it’s still working. After I go into my messages, I see the last one Diesel sent, which was yesterday morning. Since then, he’s been eerily quiet and not responded to anything I’ve texted. They’ve all gone unanswered. Every. Single. One.
Alarm bells go off in my head, and I can’t help but feel doubt creep in. My heart tells me something’s wrong, but I tell myself he’s probably just busy on a job. There are times when he doesn’t have his cell phone on him, so I try not to overreact, especially after the amazing weekend we just had, but my thirteen-year-old insecurities are resurfacing after not hearing from him. He already thinks I’m a crazy ex-girlfriend, considering what I did to Nick’s Corvette, which has proven to be a big mistake. No taking it back now, though. What’s done is done.
The next morning, I still have zero text messages from Diesel. While I’m concerned something happened to him, all I can think is if I said or did something wrong. We shared an amazing night away, and now he’s basically ghosted me. It’s exactly what Diesel promised never to do and everything my brother said he does. Unable to lie in bed any longer, I sit up and pull my hair into a high bun. I can hear Mom chatting with someone in the kitchen. Riley.
I jump out of bed and rush through the hallway because if anyone knows where Diesel is, it’s him. Once they’re done with their conversation, and Mom briefly walks away, I glance at my brother who’s looking more grown up with every passing day. Dad life is being good to him, which is nice to see.
“Hey,” I say, casually. I don’t know how to even start the conversation without him getting suspicious, but I go for it anyway. “I haven’t seen your stupid best friend around lately. Where’s he been?”
He looks at me incredulously. “Why do you care?”
I clear my throat, finding my courage. “Well, Maize needed him to help her yesterday and couldn’t get in touch with him, so I texted him this morning and got no reply too. Just wondering if he’s being his typical asshole self when a lady needs a hand. It wouldn’t be the first time.” A part of me feels guilty as hell for making up another story, but it’s the most believable thing I could come up with on the spot. Also, I can’t blow my cover.
Riley picks up his coffee cup and takes a sip. “He’s in Arizona seeing his kid, apparently.”
I glare at Riley, who laughs, but I’m almost certain I heard him wrong. “What’d you say?”
He shakes his head, grinning as if he’s about to tell me a hilarious story. “It’s a crazy story. Remember when I brought him to Vegas for his birthday?”
I nod, trying to keep a straight face, not wanting to react,