explanation even though it isn’t much of one.
She nods as clouds gather in her dark eyes. In a way, Mia can relate to someone not wanting to air their dirty laundry for people to talk about. There’s been enough bullshit with her own family—especially now that her parents are separating.
“What are you going to do?”
“I’m not sure. Colton has been really distant this week.” And that has everything to do with his mother and what happened when they met for coffee. Even though he’s been pretty tight-lipped about the meeting, it’s obvious that it didn’t go the way he’d hoped. The pain radiating from his eyes when we’d run into each other in the parking lot had been like a knife to my heart. All I’d wanted to do was pull him into my arms.
“You need to talk to him and get it figured out before this goes any further. If Colton can’t step up, then it’s time to cut your losses and move on. For real this time. I know that sounds harsh, but you deserve better than this.”
I swallow down the thick lump of emotion that has become wedged in the middle of my throat. She’s not telling me anything I don’t already know. As much as I’ve always had a thing for Colton, I’m unsure if he’ll ever be able to open up emotionally and give me the kind of relationship I need. That’s not a knock on him. It’s just the way it is.
Decision made, I grab my phone from the table and tap on Colton’s name before hastily typing out a message and hitting send before I can change my mind.
Are you busy? Can we talk?
My heart pounds a painful staccato against my ribcage as three little bubbles appear.
And then his answer is popping up.
Can’t right now.
Any hope I’d been harboring that we could sit down and have an honest conversation crashes back to earth before exploding upon impact. As much as I want to make this relationship work, as much effort as I’m willing to put in, it’s not something I can do alone. If Colton isn’t willing to meet me halfway...
Then I guess the decision has been taken out of my hands, and I have my answer.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Colton
“Good practice, man. Keep playing like that, and you’ll be on the field in no time.” Beck slaps my back as he saunters past on the way to his locker.
“Thanks.” I hate to jinx myself, but it felt like old times out there. Everything Beck threw my way, I caught with ease. There wasn’t a fumble in sight. It was nice. Reassuring. As if one piece of the puzzle has finally fallen back into place. With each practice, I’ve been steadily improving. It’s almost like I’m getting my groove back.
All I can hope is that it continues and that Coach has taken notice. So far, he hasn’t said mum about it. He’s been watching from the sidelines and jotting down notes. It’s enough to set my nerves on edge, but I try not to let the pressure get to me.
Which hasn’t been easy. Especially with everything that happened with Candace. I was afraid that it would mess with my head even more than before, but strangely enough, it’s had the opposite effect. Don’t get me wrong, what she said hurts like a mother fucker but...
I can’t allow someone who doesn’t give a damn about me to totally screw with my life. I’ve given this person way too much power, and now I’m wrestling it back. It’s taken me a couple of days to come to that epiphany, but now that I have, there’s peace to be found in the decision to walk away.
Some relationships just aren’t viable, no matter how much you wish otherwise. And when it happens to be with your own parent, it’s gut-wrenching. Afterall, in a perfect world, these are the people who are supposed to love you no matter what. Who have your back when no one else does. Who you can depend on when life goes sideways. They aren’t supposed to be the ones who bring the messed-up shit that turns your life upside-down and inside-out.
But that’s the way it goes, right?
No one ever said life was fair.
It only makes me realize how lucky I am to have Dad and Jenna.
Especially Jenna.
I appreciate her now more than ever.
As soon as Coach walks into the locker room, the boisterous voices fall silent. None of these loudmouths want to draw attention to themselves.