red bow, the curls of the giant ribbon a stark contrast with the gleaming black surface.
He couldn’t sing and his brother knew it. The last thing he wanted to do was to make a fool of himself in front of Anna. Taking his hand, she squeezed, leaning in close. “I love Christmas carols,” she whispered softly into his ear. “Do you?”
“Tonight, I love Christmas carols,” he answered dryly, keeping his voice low.
The pianist launched into the simple, and all too familiar number of Jingle Bells. After the first verse, Anna leaned in again. “Your family is so close. I kind of love it. Even if you and your brothers did argue over—what was that again?”
“Who was the better skier. And it was just Jonas and me.”
Anna laughed, but not loud enough to disrupt the singing. “Isn’t Chase the best skier?”
“Was. But back then, Chase didn’t count when it came to internal contests.” He shot his brother an apologetic look. Tana must have had one heck of an effect on Chase because he didn’t seem bothered by the comment one bit.
“Internal contests,” echoed Anna, and he could tell she thought it was funny. Yes. More of that. A familial warmth spread in the center of his chest.
Gabe really did love his family, no matter how much time he spent trying to convince himself he didn’t fit in. Not in the way that everyone else did. Gabe had wanted different things out of life—he hadn’t wanted to sign on to a permanent position at the lodge just because his brother had taken over the management of the place. But now, standing around the piano and singing Christmas songs, he wasn’t sure.
If he really were the black sheep of the family, and if he really were a disappointment to them—his grandmother wouldn’t have asked him to come home.
Maybe fitting in wasn’t the only criterion.
“You’re not singing,” Anna said, whispering in his ear. He put his hand on her waist and pulled her close. She leaned in, curvy and soft, and melted into him almost as if it were the most natural thing.
He’d been wasting time. The thought came to him as clearly as the opening notes of God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen. The other women he’d brought home would have excused themselves from singing carols. They would have stood stiffly by his side, hands folded in front of them. He’d spent so long dating women who were utterly uncomfortable being around his family, or they were just too wrapped up in their own worlds.
It had worked at the time because he’d been wrapped up in his own world. He had come here each time knowing that the goal was to leave as soon as possible, only putting in a token appearance.
This could be his real life. A part of it, anyway.
Anna rubbed her hand down his back, the gesture genuine. It unlocked an old feeling at the core of him. Belonging. That’s what it was. He felt like he belonged, like the circle of people around him would never close with Gabe on the outside.
But he’d never get to that closeness without somebody like Anna at his side. His heart beat hard, a triple drumbeat of sadness for the day when they inevitably weren’t together anymore. Those were the rules of a fake engagement. They didn’t go on to become real weddings. So as wonderful as this moment was, it was doomed to end.
Not yet.
He straightened up. His family didn’t care if he couldn’t sing. They’d all known it when they planned to go caroling in the lobby. And they wouldn’t care now. The pianist went into the next carol—Silent Night. And Gabe, with Anna close by his side, opened his mouth and sang.
6
The wine at dinner had gone straight to Anna’s head, and the effects persisted long after the singing was done. It made her skin feel warm, almost overheated, as she and Gabe took the elevator back to their suite. He didn’t drop her hand when they stepped out into the hall. He held it all the way back to the room, giving a little squeeze as he pushed the door open and led her inside.
He brought her knuckles to his lips, brushing his lips across them with a satisfied light in his gray-green eyes. “That felt good,” Gabe said, his voice husky. “Didn’t it?”
“Felt pretty real to me,” Anna said breathlessly. The two of them had stood with his family in the glittering lobby of the Elk Lodge. The tree