try not to chuckle. “I’m sorry. I’ll trim it later.”
“Not trim,” she says. “Shave.”
My palm grazes my left cheek. I started growing this out last year, when I was hospitalized after the accident. At first it was to cover the scar and to help make myself less noticeable to the general public. It was a mask of sorts. Covering everything I didn’t want to see anymore.
The scar was a reminder.
And not having to look at it every day has been a saving grace of sorts.
“Please?” Aidy says. Her face falls. “I mean, I’m assuming you might want to kiss me again. I don’t know. Could be wrong. Don’t want to get presumptuous here.”
She cuts into her eggs, mumbling to herself. If she were anyone else, it’d be annoying. It wouldn’t be endearing at all. But everything about Aidy is adorable and sexy and whimsical. She’s definitely not my type. She’s unlike anything I’ve ever given a second look to before. When I really sit and think about it, I still barely know her.
The fact that she’s here, sitting across from me at my lake house, spending time with me despite the fact that she could be with anyone else probably having way more fun, is nothing short of a miracle, and it’s not lost on me.
“I want to kiss you again,” I declare.
Aidy stops chewing and looks up.
“I’m going to kiss you again,” I correct myself.
Her lips pull into a pleased half-smile. “Well then, you know exactly what you need to do.”
I drag my hand across my beard again. “Can I think about it?”
“Nope.”
“You have no idea what you’re asking of me.” I doubt I can make her feel sorry for me, but it’s worth a shot.
“Does your beard serve some kind of purpose?”
“Yeah. Kind of,” I say.
Aidy tilts her head. “What purpose could it possibly be serving you? It’s July. You don’t live in the mountains. You’re devilishly handsome. What does this beard do besides make you look closed off and angry and hide that incredible smile of yours I think I’ve seen all of one time since we met?”
I know damn well I don’t smile much, but in my defense, I didn’t smile much before either. Kerenza was constantly saying it was the only thing she never understood about me. Why would a man, who had every reason in the world to be smiling, refuse to do so? I had the career of my dreams. The woman of my dreams. The home of my dreams. The entire world was at my fingertips.
I never could give her a straight answer that went beyond the fact that I’m not a bubbly and effervescent person. It’s just not how I was made. Maybe I’m too serious. Too intense. Maybe I live too hard and love too hard.
It’s how I’ve always been. I’m wired this way. I don’t think I could change if I tried, and I’m not even sure I want to.
I wear my personality like a coat of armor. It works for me. Always has.
“There’s a scar on my left cheek,” I say, keeping it brief and to the point. “The beard hides it.”
Aidy sits back, expression softening. “Oh, that’s all?”
I chuff, finishing the last of my breakfast. “Yep. That’s all.”
“Is it from your accident?”
I should’ve known she was going to ask questions.
“It is,” I say.
“I’m sure it’s not that bad.”
My eyes flick into hers. “Don’t feel like staring at it every day.”
“What happened?” she asks carefully. “With your accident?”
Exhaling hard, I stand and carry my plate to the sink. “I thought you Googled it.”
“I did,” she says. “But you know how those articles are, mostly speculation mixed in with details they yanked from the accident report.”
Standing at the sink, my back to her, I debate giving her the cold hard truth. Telling her where I was going that night and why I was going there and what I was going to do once I got there. Not a day goes by that I don’t regret getting in the car that night.
My body burns from the inside out, my breath growing ragged.
And then I feel the warmth of her palm on the back of my shoulder. “It’s okay. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
Aidy sits her plate on top of mine in the sink and then slinks away.
“Want to go canoeing today?” she asks.
My shoulders relax, and I turn her way. “Yeah.”
Our eyes catch and she smiles.
“Good,” she says. “I’ll go change.”
Twenty-Three
Aidy
* * *
“Why