baby, and Lucien knew he would never get the sight out of his mind for as long as he lived. He had sweet-talked the nurses into letting him into the NICU with Trace so he could be there for his friend. And seeing Trace holding such a small baby, watching the tears that streamed down his friend’s face as he looked at her, Lucien knew what Trace was thinking as if he were saying it out loud. If Ember died, her baby was all that he would have left of her. It wasn’t fucking right.
Ember had been in the coma for five hours. Except to see his new daughter, Trace never left her side, holding her hand and demanding that she come back to him. Lucien really didn’t want to think about what-if, but they may just have to. He looked over at Trace, who was waiting to see Ember while the nurses were in with her, checking her IVs. He looked lost.
“I’m going to go wait with Trace,” he said to Darcy as he lifted her from his lap, but he stopped in midmotion. “You are in a hospital.”
“And my opinion of them hasn’t improved,” she said sadly. “Should you take him some food? I don’t think he’s eaten anything.”
“Good idea. Could you ask Brandon to bring him a sandwich?”
“I will.”
Lucien pressed his mouth to Darcy’s, and they lingered over the kiss, heartbroken for their friend and grateful for each other. He said nothing when he leaned up against the wall next to Trace. He knew his friend well enough to know that if he needed to talk, he would.
“She looks just like Ember,” Trace said softly.
“She’s beautiful.”
Trace looked over at his friend, and the sight of his despair ripped through Lucien. “I can’t do this without her. Fuck, I was okay before she came into my life. I learned to be alone and then she came pushing her way into my life and, fuck, how do I go back?”
“You don’t. You can’t because, even if we lose Ember, she’s left a piece of herself with you. She’ll always be with you, Trace, and I know it may not be in the way you want and, believe me, I understand, but she will always be with you.”
Trace hung his head and his voice broke when he said, “It’s not enough, not fucking nearly enough.”
Two days after Ember was brought into the ER, Trace stood in the corner of the waiting room with Lucien and Rafe. As Lucien looked at his friend, he knew that he was beginning to give up hope.
How did one plan for that? How did someone pick up the pieces and continue on when a part of them was gone? Chelsea was inconsolable, crying on Seth’s shoulder, not fully understanding why Ember wouldn’t wake up.
What should have been one of the happiest times in all of their lives was some fucked-up nightmare, a nightmare Lucien knew would haunt Trace for the rest of his life.
Trace spoke from his corner, “I was so afraid of this pregnancy, afraid that if something happened to Ember, I would lose my way, fall back into that pit with my demons, but she’s changed me. As hard as it will be, I can live a life without her; I can parent our child alone . . .” There were tears in his eyes when he looked over at Lucien. “I can do it because of her. We’re her legacy, my daughter and me.”
The moment was shattered when an alarm went off down the hall in the direction of Ember’s room. Trace was off the wall and running down the hall and Lucien had just caught up when Dr. Cole turned to Trace, crying.
Trace stumbled, falling into the wall as tears streamed down his cheeks. Anguish filled his expression, the sight so raw and heartbreaking that Lucien didn’t even realize he was crying himself until he couldn’t see the doctor anymore. And then she said, “She’s awake.”
Lucien’s head snapped to Trace who was looking at the doctor, but clearly not hearing her. The doctor smiled wider, “She’s awake and asking for you.”
The doctors cleared the room and, for a few hours, Trace just held Ember’s hand while she went in and out of consciousness. Four hours after she woke, her eyes opened and stayed open. He saw when she focused because a smile touched her lips. If he weren’t sitting, he would have fallen to his knees in gratitude. He pressed his