I had to get off the sinking ship before I ended up like that idiot in the Titanic.”
Pangs of sympathy pound in my chest like someone’s trying to remember how to play their underused steel drum.
“I told her I couldn’t do it anymore. She didn’t seem to care that it was over, and I think that might’ve hurt most of all.”
My mouth moves to offer him apologies, yet nothing comes out.
What’s the appropriate thing to say to your current boyfriend when consoling him about a past pain involving his ex-girlfriend? Oh, wrong choice of term. Ex-fuck friend? Wow. That sounds…classy.
“Eventually, we agreed to try to be friends. Our grandmothers – at the time – were in the same assisted living center, plus I was constantly in her city to do wedding shit with Harrison, so our paths were definitely gonna cross. I may have been holding out hope all she needed was a little space to come to her senses, but when she reached out to me only because her husband had ended up in jail and needed some help, I knew it was time to truly let go.” Ax’s thumbs tap together, taking a pause. “Once I wrapped up his case, I made a point not to see Knox anymore. My grandmother died shortly after it, ending the likeliness of us just randomly running into each other. I closed my second shop, which was the one she loved more, and fully dedicated myself to building a Knox-free life here. She collects these perfume bottles, which is how we met to begin with, and we had had an arrangement where I’d call if one came in. I kept it, but I stopped calling personally. Always have the staff do it even if I’m the one to find it. They know to inform me on what day she should be coming in, and I always make sure to be far away with a bottle of tequila or my favorite board.”
“Lucy,” I innocently acknowledge. “Your red and white longboard.”
He can’t stop the smile that spreads across his face. “Do you have any idea how much more it makes me love you knowing that you know that?”
My body gives a small arrogant wiggle.
“I hadn’t seen Knox in about four and a half years,” Ax announces on a heavy sigh. “I wasn’t expecting to…ever…see her again, and I, obviously, wasn’t prepared by my poor fucking reaction.”
Tension tip toes along the back of my neck.
“Old habits wipeout hard…”
His response or reaction to her isn’t as completely farfetched or unforgiveable as I want it to be, especially not after hearing how attached he was to her. However, it does leave me needing an answer to something in order for this to go on. “Did you love her?”
“I thought I did.” All of a sudden, Ax crosses over and sits down at my side, angling his body towards me. “But I never felt anything for her like what I feel for you.”
The ability to breathe is momentarily stolen.
“I’ve never felt this way about another person in my entire life.” His eyes cut a glance at my fingers, clearly tempted to touch them. “Brooklyn, I couldn’t give a fuck less if I never saw her again or saw her every day from this point forward. She doesn’t matter to me. She’s not worth the brain power to consider what life would be like with or without her presence. But you?” He inches closer bumping into Houndrix. “That’s all my mind’s been able to think about and dream about and wonder about. When was I going to see you again? When was I going to hear from you again? How long until you came home again?” Ax swiftly captures my fingers and lifts them up to plant a kiss on the knuckles. “And, this is your home, babe. This is where you belong. This is where I want you every morning and every night and every day until the sun sets on my existence and my soul takes its final surf.”
Something similar to a swoon slips free.
“Move in with me,” he says sweetly, the words a mixture of a statement and a question.
A bit blind-sided, yet completely tempted, is what has me searching for confirmation in a whisper, “Are you sure that’s what you want, Ax?” My voice struggles to find its strength. “Are you sure that’s what you really want, and that this isn’t some big gesture just to prove you’re sorry? Because I believe that you’re sorry.