Chapter One
Lila
What are you doing, Lila? No, really. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
Music pumped from the small house. Loud, pulsating. But my feet kept moving me toward it, ignoring my brain that screamed at me to turn around and go home.
I wasn’t going to do that, even with my heart beating out of my chest.
You’ve lost your freaking mind, my common sense cried.
This isn’t you. You don’t do things like this.
You’re acting like a crazy person.
I refused to listen. Maybe this was me? How would I know? Maybe this was exactly the kind of thing I would have done if I hadn’t been controlled and stifled most of my life.
I’d never been given the chance to find out. I’d spent my life living in the shadow of my sister’s “transgressions,” forced to be a good girl, to always do the right thing. Obey the rules or face a similar fate as Kate. Sixteen, pregnant, and completely cut off.
Sometimes, I thought she got the better deal.
As a result, I was cripplingly shy at the best of times. I’d certainly never gone to a party alone—or done much of anything without my best friend, Everly.
You can do this.
The nerves knotting my belly gripped tighter as I walked up the cracked concrete path to Jesse’s house.
Members of the Ramblers MC were scattered around the yard, drinking and laughing, singing. There were a lot of women as well, wearing not very much. I cringed down at myself.
I’d changed out of the pencil skirt and shirt I’d worn to work because looking like a librarian when I came to offer myself to Jesse didn’t seem like the best choice. This was a big step for me, and I’d struggled to find the courage to make my move. I’d never imagined he would be having a party. My skinny jeans and sweater looked more evening picnic by the lake than biker bonfire. The stares aimed at me now, following my progress to the front door, made it obvious I wasn’t the only one who thought so.
A massive shirtless guy with a full beard and covered in tattoos stood at the base of the steps, barring my entry.
“Hey, babe.” He grinned and reached out, rubbing some of my dark brown hair between his thick, rough fingers, tugging gently. “Want a drink?”
I shoved my glasses higher on my nose. “I’m ah…I’m actually looking for Jesse.” Leave.
The guy cocked his head. “Jesse?”
“Sorry um…I mean Grifter. Can you please tell him I’m here?”
The big biker stepped even closer, crowding me. “Now why would a nice girl like you be looking for Riff?”
Leave. Get the heck out of there.
The urge to run was insanely strong now, but I held my ground. I was determined to see Jesse. And it had to be tonight. Everly’s boyfriend, Dane, was Jesse’s best friend, which was how I found out Jesse was leaving for an undisclosed length of time. Something was going on, and no one would tell me what it was. Dane wasn’t here tonight; he and Eves were having a night in, which was why I’d made the hour-and-a-quarter-long drive from Rocktown to Black Stone, the town Jesse called home.
I didn’t want an audience if this went badly. I also couldn’t let him leave without at least talking to him first. You’re hoping to do a whole lot more than talk.
I straightened my spine. “He asked me to come. He’ll be annoyed if I’m late.”
The guy pinned me to the spot with his dark stare, like he was waiting for me to crack and confess the truth, but finally he jerked his head toward the door. “He’s out back, but you come on back here when he’s done with you, sweetheart, yeah?”
I shuddered. Not likely.
Instead of going inside and fighting my way through the crowd, I strode around the side of the house and peeked around the corner into the backyard.
There was a bonfire blazing back there and people stood around it talking, dancing, and…making out. There was a lot of sucking face going on…and um, other things.
I ignored the guy getting a blow job in full view of everyone and searched for Jesse.
He wasn’t hard to find.
He stood by the bonfire, his dark blond hair hidden under the ball cap he often wore. He was wearing worn black jeans low on his hips and his MC cut. He had nothing on under it, and his inked upper body was on full display. His skin, the small amount not covered in ink, was deeply tanned,