hell that she’s signing those papers without consulting her attorney. Not when New York and New Jersey are both no-fault divorce states that believe in a fair and equitable distribution of marital assets.”
He drops his hands from my shoulders, and I have to force myself not to whimper at the loss. But then I realize the only reason he pulled away is because he has to reach for his wallet. I step back again and watch as he takes a card out and offers it to Karl.
“I’m not Mallory’s lawyer,” he says. “But she is at my firm. I expect you to contact us by Wednesday with a full accounting of all marital assets—or I’m sure my partner will be more than happy to see you in court. And I think we both know that the judge won’t look kindly on an adulterous ex trying to cheat his former wife out of her fair settlement just so he can pay for his pregnant mistress—a mistress who, by the looks of it, got pregnant before the separation even took place.”
Nick puts his arm back around me—but this time, it’s around my waist—and smiles down at me with twinkling eyes. “I hope this hasn’t put you off dinner. I have plans for you later, and you’re going to need all the energy you can get.”
And I can’t help the cheesecake smile I lay on him. Full wattage, no holds barred. How did he know Karl showing up with his pregnant mistress would make me feel undesirable? Like I’m not woman enough to satisfy my man or some other archaic feeling that I really shouldn’t be having right now but am? The next words are out of my mouth before I can stop them. “I hope those plans include that wild thing you did with your tongue last time.”
Like a switch has been flipped, the teasing glint in his eyes turns to molten lava in point-two seconds flat. As though he completely forgot Karl was even standing there, he leans down and whispers against my cheek, “You can count on it.”
A shiver of anticipation skates along my skin as Nick pulls me tighter into his side and steers me back to the patio, Karl and Sasha dismissed.
“Looking forward to hearing from you,” Nick tosses over his shoulder right before he opens the back gate and ushers me through.
Chapter Twenty-Two
As the gate closes behind us and I settle back into the hard metal patio chair, the loss of Nick’s warmth and strength is immediate. The cold seeps into my bones so fast, I shiver.
There is a part of me that wants to ask Nick what the hell just happened. There is another, bigger part that knows I should thank him. But then there is the biggest part—the one that is still reeling from everything. Everything I just found out. And that part wins.
My shoulders sag in defeat. I wanted to be a mother my entire adult life. I mean, yes, for a long time, I also wanted to be an attorney, but even then I wanted to be a mom, too. A mom like my aunt Maggie would have been, not my own mom. Fun and loving and full of life.
All those years with Karl, I let that dream fall by the wayside because he seemed so sure he didn’t want to start a family yet.
Except that was obviously not true. It wasn’t that he didn’t want kids; he just didn’t want them with me.
Could I possibly, possibly have been a bigger fool? I really don’t think so.
I am aware, in a very vague way, of something cold being pressed against my hand. I look down and am a little surprised to see my wineglass from earlier resting against my palm.
“Thank you.” I don’t know if I’m thanking him for standing up to Karl or for taking care of me or for handing me my wine. Maybe all three.
Either way, Nick doesn’t exactly seem inclined to ask me what I’m thanking him for. Instead, he just kind of nods before awkwardly sticking his hands in his suit pants pockets.
I can’t believe this. I just can’t believe this.
I know I should be grateful that I don’t have a kid with Karl, that I don’t have to try to co-parent through what looks like it’s going to be an incredibly contentious divorce.
But I’ll be grateful tomorrow. Tonight…tonight, I just want to grieve.
For what was and for what could have been if I’d just been a little