Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever kicked a chunk of frozen gray snow off your wheel well?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever paid full price for replacement charger cords from the Apple store?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever cashed in a rebate?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever bookmarked a lasagna recipe?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever tried Lasix?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever been in McDonald’s so early you couldn’t get fries?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever watched a bunch of syndicated CBS comedies in a row?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever burst into flames while casually scrolling through Instagram and stumbling across your wife wearing some shit you know is yours?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever finally broken down and gone to see a dermatologist?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever talked to your cat like he was a real person?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever subscribed to a magazine that has more words than pictures?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever eaten the leftovers before everyone else wakes up?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever deeply related to a nihilist meme?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever done low-impact high-intensity interval training along with a YouTube video when no one else could see you?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever had a scalp massage?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever been to Trader Joe’s right after a restock?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever given a crying baby back to its parent?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever unboxed a bunch of shit you don’t need from Amazon, broken down the box, and gotten all that unnecessary plastic that came with it into the dumpster before your wife got home from work?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever tried noise-canceling headphones?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever split a water bill?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever rubbed CBD oil on an achy knee joint?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever cheerfully woken up at 7 a.m. after going to bed at a reasonable hour the night before?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever read a romance novel?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever ordered vitamins from a subscription service that delivers them to your house every month whether you’ve remembered to take them or not?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever cared very deeply for someone you never want to have sex with?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever watched birds eat from a feeder you filled and hung for them?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever been to couples therapy?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever watched The West Wing from beginning to end?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever paid real money to read articles on the Internet?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever worn a T-shirt with words on it, then spent the entire day awkwardly waiting for people to finish reading your breasts?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever cut a toxic bitch right out of your life?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever spent more than twelve dollars on one plate?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever explained your very specific food allergy to a waiter who doesn’t give a fuck?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever tried Dijon mustard?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever bent down to ask a dog its name?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever listened to Oprah’s SuperSoul Conversations?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever bonded with the one other person on this planet who likes black licorice as much as you do?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever thrown out your high school yearbooks?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever used a really absorbent towel?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever eaten jalape?o Doritos?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever responded to a celebrity tweet?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever filled out the paperwork at a new doctor’s office and remembered all your current diseases and medications on the first try?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever had exact change?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever watched videos of Barack Obama surprising people?
Sure, sex is fun, but have you ever chosen to look at pictures of your