her. So, he had been thinking about what she’d said, and all this time, too. “That’s not exactly what he wants to do.” She straightened on the seat and focused on the horses’ ears flicking forward and back as they tried to eavesdrop on the conversation. “Papa worries about me and wants to see me with a good husband who will take care of me and provide a secure home and children.”
“You don’t want that?”
Her lips twisted. “I’d rather be a spinster.”
She felt his chocolate eyes dart in her direction, but he said nothing to reveal his thoughts.
Her shoulders sagged. “That’s not entirely true, I suppose—not if the right man came along.” She didn’t dare look at him as she said that! “But I’ve been resisting courtships and refusing to accept suitors the way Papa wants me to.”
He snapped the ribbons. “Lord Darlington only wants the best for you.”
“I only want the best for me, too, but that doesn’t mean being shackled to the first society heir who comes along.” Or the second, or the third. She wasn’t certain she’d find happiness with any of the lot of them. “Unlike some women, I’ve never cared about the size of a man’s…allowance.”
He stiffened. Pleasure sparked through her that she could still keep him on his toes with her innuendos and flirtations. Thank God some things never changed.
“So I made an agreement with Papa to give me three years to raise and train Midnight before I accepted suitors. If the colt wins the Derby, he’ll allow me to continue to run my own life, even one as an unmarried horse breeder.”
“And if you lose?”
If, not when. Perhaps Shaw thought she had a chance at winning after all, and her heart skipped with excitement. “Then I’ll go onto the marriage market, just as every other society miss does.” She’d resolved herself to that, yet she couldn’t prevent a bitter taste from forming on her tongue at the thought.
“How did you convince the viscount to go along with this ludicrous plan?” A harsh edge of frustration undercut whatever casualness he’d hoped for.
“The usual way any daughter cajoles her father into letting her do what she wants, I suppose,” she said dryly. “I threatened to run away to New York.”
He threw a surprised glance her way.
She smiled victoriously. “Apparently, the only thing my father fears more than having a daughter who’s a horse breeder is having a daughter who’s an American.”
His lips quirked into a grin. “So you bought yourself a three-year delay.”
“A lifetime when I win.”
“You won’t win.”
“Because you think you will? I hate to tell you this, Jack.” She reached to pull the ribbons from his hands and take over driving the team down the narrow country road. “But you can’t always get what you want.”
“Believe me,” he said quietly with regret, “I’ve already learned that lesson.”
She turned to gape at him. He couldn’t possibly mean—
“Attention on the horses,” he ordered, putting his gloved hand over hers and gesturing at the horses’ flicking ears with the other. “They’re still a fairly green team and will take advantage if you let them.”
She stared straight ahead, fully aware of the heat and strength of his hand on hers. Memories flooded through her of having his hands on her body, of all the delicious pleasures he’d given her. She swallowed. Hard. “And would you—take advantage if I let you?”
“If it means winning the Derby, any man would.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
A long, silent pause passed as he reconsidered her meaning. Then he repeated hoarsely, “Any man would.”
She pulled back sharply on the ribbons, bringing the team to a sliding halt as she swung around on the bench to face him. His hand remained over hers, and the heat of his touch seeped through the leather and into her fingers. He didn’t move, yet she felt wary anticipation pulse within him.
She ached to touch him, to run trembling fingers through his hair, slip her hand behind his nape, and tug his head down to hers. She yearned for the taste of his kiss, for his mouth to hungrily devour hers, his tongue to tease across her lips until she opened to him. For his strong arms to gather her close. For the way he’d always made her laugh with his stories and the affectionate gleam in his eyes.
The closeness between them had always been about more than just physical intimacies, yet when she’d been in his arms, she’d felt safe, confident…loved.
She wanted nothing more than to be