The Wind's Call (The Broken Lands #4) - T.A. White Page 0,161
Eva asked.
Shea rubbed her belly, a thoughtful look on her face. "Sometimes. My life would be very different had I chosen another path. Not better necessarily, but definitely different. I'm happy with where I ended up." She gestured to the surrounding room.
Shea's situation was a little different than Eva's. She'd chosen Fallon over her duty. Love instead of her people.
Eva was being faced with choosing duty over the potential for something more.
"I had to compromise," Shea said as if reading her thoughts. "I've never been one who had a strong calling. I loved pathfinding and I was good at it, but in the end, there will always be other pathfinders. There was only one Fallon and only he could accomplish what he’d set out to do."
Shea shifted in the seat again, trying to get comfortable despite the very pregnant belly making that difficult.
"It's not either or, you know," Shea said, smoothing a hand over her stomach. "I chose love once, and then duty when I faced the Badlands with little hope of returning." Her smile was pained as if nightmares haunted the edges. "You have to decide which is more important to you in this moment and hope that when the dice roll again, you'll get a chance at another choice."
"You think I should do it," Eva accused.
Shea shook her head. "I think you need to decide what you want and how you're going to get it. Two paths lay before you."
"If I don't do this, the Kyren won't choose another," Eva said stubbornly.
Shea lifted a shoulder. "That won't be your problem. It’s ours. We've come this far without them. No reason we need them now."
But they did need them. It was the only reason they were having this conversation.
"Think it over," Shea advised. "You don't need to decide now."
"If I go, I'll never be one of the Trateri," Eva said.
They would never fully accept her.
Shea leaned her head back. "Neither will I. Sometimes being part of the crowd is overrated. I've always preferred the ones who forge their own path. The Trateri might say one thing, but I think in many ways, they're like me. They respect the odd, brave idiots who throw society’s arbitrary rules out the window."
Maybe some of them. Those like Fiona and Hanna, Ollie and Hardwick. She could see them understanding. But the Trateri as a whole? Who could say?
Shea leveraged herself out of her seat. "Enough of this. They tell me pregnancy is supposed to be joyous and amazing, but at this point I would sell several of my favorite parts of Fallon’s body to be done with it."
Eva smothered her smile. "I'm not sure he’d appreciate that."
Shea's look was sharp. "Then perhaps next time he shouldn't get me into this situation."
"And you and Fallon will let me walk away from this?" Eva challenged.
"Neither one of us wants someone who would be bitter about their fate acting as our liaison to the Kyren. What they offer is a rare opportunity. If you can't recognize that, then you don't deserve it," Shea said with a significant look. "You're a herd mistress without a herd. They're offering to give you one."
And Eva would likely never have one here.
"You don't know this, because he's a dodgy old man, but Hardwick is training you as his replacement," Shea revealed after a few minutes.
Eva's forehead wrinkled. "No, that's for Ollie. He's his heir."
Shea shook her head. "From what I hear—and my sources are top notch—your friend has already refused. He doesn't have the temperament to stand up to fractious warriors. Hardwick has already offered to sponsor you into his clan."
Eva's breath felt like it was sucked out of her. It was a big deal. The equivalent of being adopted by Hardwick. Her crimes became his and vice versa.
Shea's lips twisted up, the smile barely touching her eyes. "It seems you're not as alone or outcast as you thought."
Eva didn't know what to think of this revelation. Her head was spinning as her world reordered itself.
"Why are you telling me this?" Eva finally asked.
If Shea had remained silent, she would have been forced to choose the Kyren, if only for the chance at her own herd. Shea's revelation basically guaranteed her a life here.
"Because you deserve to have all the facts before you make your decision," Shea said simply.
Eva didn't know if that made her kind or cruel. This choice wouldn't be an easy one.
There was a small sound of pain as the Battle Queen bent forward slightly.