the baby?” she asked, hastening closer, and then ruined any softening I might have felt toward her at this display of genuine concern. “I told you not to go traipsing about the city. I told you . . .”
“I know you paid a visit to Rookwood Publishing,” I interrupted, cutting off her diatribe.
Her eyes widened, and for once she seemed to be at a loss for words.
“I know you called on him the very day he was murdered. That’s why you were so flustered when you arrived late to my appointment with Dr. Fenwick.”
She clamped her mouth shut and turned away.
“What were you doing there, Alana? And why didn’t you tell me?” When she didn’t answer, I shifted on the couch, lowering my feet to the ground as I sat upright. “Did you go to confront him? Did Philip accompany you?” My breath tightened seeing the way her back heaved in and out with each of her agitated breaths. “Did something happen? Did . . . did he attack you?” But then I remembered how Rookwood’s body had been found. “Did you lose your temper?”
“No, I did not lose my temper!” she whirled around to shriek at me. “How could you even think . . . ?” She stamped her foot, her face flushed as she struggled to restrain her anger. “He was alive when I left him.”
“But why did you go . . . ?”
“To clean up your mess. Again. To demand he tell me who Mugdock is, so he can be made to retract his nonsense before your child is born. With our luck the baby will have a crown of hair as dark as yours was, and no one will ever believe the child is Gage’s.”
I shook my head. “Alana, people are going to choose to believe whatever they wish to, no matter what shade of hair our child is born with. But those closest to us, those who genuinely care for us know what utter nonsense that book’s suppositions are. And the rest can go hang.”
“So you say, but what about in eight or nine years’ time, when your son goes off to school and the other boys make slanderous accusations about his parentage. Or when your daughter makes her debut and the other debutantes taunt her.”
I frowned, unsettled by the prospect, but more so that she should wave it in my face when there was nothing to be done about it. “That is many years from now. Plenty of time for the truth to be made evident.” After all, the child wasn’t likely to be an exact replica of me.
She swiveled away from me abruptly, marching across the rug with her hands clenched into fists before turning on her heel to once again face me. “Don’t you understand? They only view all this as proof they were right about you all along. That this is your due.”
I stiffened, shocked to hear her state such a thing so baldly. I knew there were people who didn’t like me, who were determined to think the worst of me simply because I’d never seemed to be able to behave in the prescribed manner, especially when I was younger. In general, I didn’t like balls and soirees, or fashion, or small talk. I didn’t care for the same things that other young ladies seemed to. But most people who genuinely tried to get to know me seemed to like me well enough. It was merely my public awkwardness which repelled or offended people. But Alana was implying it went deeper than that.
“When the scandal about your involvement with Sir Anthony came to light, they expected you to go into hiding, to live out the rest of your days meek and remorseful,” she continued, mistaking my astonishment for confusion. “And you did, for a time. But you proved yourself to be stronger and more resilient than they could have ever imagined. I was so proud of you for that.” She sat beside me, taking hold of my hand. Her face softened. “You regained your footing, and you embarked on these investigations with Gage, and I encouraged it because I thought it was helping. And it did. And your courage was rewarded when Gage fell in love with you, giving you a second chance at the life you should have had all along.”
“But . . . ?” I prompted, unwilling to be mollified by her display of affection when I knew there were more hurtful things to come.
“But there are those