as broken as the memories made me feel. “For the first several decades, I was too grief-stricken to wonder why turning Vlad was the last thing Tenoch did. Then Vlad began exhibiting powers he could have only if Tenoch had poured the remainder of Cain’s legacy into Vlad when he turned him. That’s when I knew that Tenoch had designated Vlad as my new murderer, if the need arose.”
“Perhaps Tenoch emptied his remaining portion of Cain’s legacy into Vlad because he knew that soon, he’d have no need of it?”
I gave Ian a look he didn’t deserve. “Then he could’ve given it to me, but he didn’t. Not then and not thousands of years earlier, either.”
Ian propped himself up on his elbow. “You’re referring to Tenoch giving Mencheres that power, after Tenoch turned Mencheres into a vampire.”
I gave a brisk nod. “Soon after Tenoch turned me into a vampire, there was . . . an incident involving my other abilities. What I did terrified him, but he loved me too much to kill me. So, he made me vow to always keep that part of myself locked away, then bequeathed Cain’s legacy of power to Mencheres.” I gave a humorless laugh. “Mencheres was my intended executioner, if I broke my vow and let the other half of me take over. Mencheres didn’t know it, but I always did.”
Rage blasted across Ian’s features before it vanished. In a carefully controlled tone, he said, “Tenoch told you that?”
A surge of defensiveness made me sit up. “You don’t understand. What you’ve seen of my powers is only a little slice of what I’m actually capable of. Tenoch didn’t make this decision lightly. He was thinking of the greater good—”
“The greater good.” Scorn dripped from Ian’s tone. “I’d have to think long and hard to find three words more widely twisted to excuse the infliction of needless pain and suffering than those.”
“Maybe,” I said. “Tenoch believed it when it came to me, though. I—I thought he’d stopped fearing me because we’d been through so much. Then he died, and Vlad began manifesting powers he couldn’t have on his own.” I tried to laugh, but it came out as a strangled sob. “Tenoch must’ve thought Mencheres wouldn’t be enough to take me down. Mencheres had sunk into a depression after his first wife left him and began plotting against him. So, Tenoch dumped the last of his legacy powers into Vlad, then killed himself with a horde of ghouls two weeks later.”
Leaving me reeling with grief, guilt and a resounding sense of culpability, once I’d put it all together.
“No wonder you refer to your other abilities as a separate person.” Ian’s voice was very soft. “It’s how you compartmentalized the pain when it was too much to bear.”
Once, I would’ve argued. Now, I closed my eyes. “Perhaps.”
“Tenoch was still a bloody fool.”
My eyes snapped open in time to see my vision flash with black. Ian didn’t flinch from the rage he had to see as well as scent.
“He might have been well-intentioned, but like millions of parents who reject their children over things they don’t understand, Tenoch was wrong. You are exactly as you should be, and it’s Tenoch’s loss that he never realized that.”
Anguish tightened my muscles until it felt like I was being beaten from the inside. “You didn’t see what I did—”
“As a new vampire dealing with incredibly heightened senses and emotions that doubtless activated the abilities in your other nature?” Ian made a contemptuous noise. “I don’t have to see it to know a slip of supernatural control doesn’t make you a monster that needs to be exterminated. Yes, your power can be dangerous, but the same can be said for your vampire side. Or your human one, when that applied.”
“Tenoch would never have gone to such extremes unless he knew it was the only way!”
I’d repeated that to myself countless times over the centuries. Otherwise, the knowledge that Tenoch had still considered me a threat to be eliminated when he died would break me.
“Fear can make people do terrible things, even to the ones they love,” Ian replied in a softer tone. “You know that. You just can’t bring yourself to admit it when it comes to Tenoch. Makes you feel disloyal, and that’s just the beginning. When you realize it was Tenoch who was wrong, not you, you have to confront the fact that you stuffed half of yourself into a cage merely to appease the fears of a