disentangles himself. “Hang on a sec.”
He lifts away, and I’m cold without him. I remove my glasses and put them on the nightstand, pretending I’m not worried he’s about to walk away.
Ben digs his wallet from his back pocket and flushes bright red when he pulls a condom from it.
I laugh. I can’t help it. He looks so funny—ashamed and pleased at the same time.
“Austin insists I go packing, no matter what.” He tosses the condom to the nightstand and tucks away the wallet. “Even if I’m spending Saturday night alone at the grocery store. You never know, Austin says. He’s a dickhead.”
“I see.” I’m giddy. “Do you seduce many women at the grocery store? I hear it’s a good place to pick up chicks.”
“Chicks?” Ben’s smile crinkles his eyes. “Who the hell says that? And no. I don’t go out much.”
“Me either.” I point my toes in my sneakers. “I’m always dancing.”
“I bet you don’t mean at a club. Also a good place to pick up girls. Or guys. I hear.”
I widen my eyes. “People go to clubs and dance? You mean like, with other people?”
“That’s what I’m told.” Ben shrugs. “I wouldn’t know.”
“We both like to stay at home then.” I hope I’m right. “That’s not such a bad thing.”
“Lots of good things to do at home.” Ben yanks off his shoes. “Work on a program, catch up on reading. This.” He waves his hand at me and the bed.
“There’s also talking, but I think we should do that later.”
“Agreed.”
Ben comes back down to me, shoeless, and we share another long, scorching kiss.
This is really happening. I run my hands down his strong back, tugging his shirt out of my way so I can find his skin. He releases my mouth so he can kiss my neck, sending fire through my veins.
I need this man. I haven’t needed in a long time. I realize I’ve been working hard at both the office and dance so I can ignore physical desires, or at least I tell myself I can ignore them.
It’s been so long since I felt anything at all with a man that I believed myself numb. Now my heart’s banging, my body shaking. I’m excited for the first time in forever.
Ben licks my throat. “You’re a paradox.”
“No one’s ever called me that before,” I say nervously. “What do you mean? That is, I know what a paradox is …”
Ben continues through my babbling. “You’re slender but so strong.” He runs a hand down my abdomen. “And at the same time, light. It’s like you flew when I watched you tonight.”
“Thank you.” The greatest compliment a dancer can receive is that what we do seems effortless. It’s not—there’s grunting and struggle and pain—but we hide that under makeup and our stage face. But it should look effortless.
Ben studies me, no smiling. “I’m not sweet-talking you, I’m serious. You have so much strength.”
He makes me want to cry like a big, loopy baby. Strength, my ass. I’ve been swimming around, trying to make myself believe I’m wonderful without anyone else in my life. My own best friend.
“So do you.” I rest my hands on his warm back. “How else could you lug all that computer stuff around?”
Ben’s smile returns. “Now I know you’re shitting me.”
I start to protest but he silences me with a fiery kiss. Fine by me. I wrap myself around him and enjoy the hell out of the moment.
Ben
I can’t believe I’m on Erin’s bed, in her arms.
She’s hot, and I’m dying for her but trying to be cool. I should take it slow, like Austin says a lady wants.
To hell with that.
She’s already stroking under my shirt, so I slide hers up. She helps, quickly wresting the shirt off over her head. I guess she’s in as much a hurry as me.
I wasn’t wrong about her strength. Her abdomen is smooth, her shoulders tight. I wriggle my hand beneath her black satin bra and unhook it. Erin zips it off before I have the chance to do it for her.
Her breasts are plenty full enough for me—firm and apple-sized, fitting into the hand not stinging from the cactus. Her nipples are dark points, and I lean to take one in my mouth.
I lick her skin, savoring, and suckle her nipple, liking how it tightens in my mouth. At the same time, she’s soft all over, skin like satin.
Erin’s tugging open my shirt, so I rip the tie from my neck and toss it off. I