tell me something.
Trying to push the thought away to the back of my mind again, I tried to just live in the present. Even if things were about to go downhill, everything was okay right now. And if I had learned anything when Milos had kidnapped me last summer, it was that you needed to appreciate what you had in this moment because anything and everything could change in the blink of an eye.
“I want to ride the Ferris wheel with Branden,” Maddie told me and Vince. “But after that, I want to go on the Tilt-a-whirl with you guys.”
“So, I’m not invited on the Tilt-a-whirl with you?” Branden asked.
“Nope. This is a tradition that’s just for us besties. No mates allowed. No offense, Julie.” Vince shot an apologetic look at his mate.
“None taken. I actually want to go play some games, anyway,” Julie said with a shrug.
“Do you want me to come with you?” Vince asked.
She shook her head. “No, you’ll ruin my focus. I’ll catch you later,” she said, kissing him on the cheek and then heading in the other direction.
“You know what’s really weird? Not having Iris as a friend this year,” Vince commented. “This is our first end of the year festival without her.”
“I know what you mean,” I agreed with a nod. It wasn’t that I missed Iris, because I didn’t. In my mind, she was the very definition of a monster.
But what I missed was the Iris that she’d led us to believe she was, the Iris she had never actually been. The illusion of Iris was what I missed the most.
“It is what it is, I guess,” Vince said with a sigh. “I’m going to get a lemonade. I’ll meet you over at the Tilt-a-whirl.”
“Sounds like a plan,” I agreed with a nod.
Glancing around for my mates, I didn’t see them anywhere. Except for Rhys, who was heading in my direction.
He smiled as he approached me, and his dark blue eyes slid over to meet mine. “You know what today is, right?”
A smile hit my lips as the realization hit me. “Our anniversary.”
Two years ago, at the end of the year festival, Rhys had kissed me. He was the last of my original four mates to kiss me.
“Yup. You know, I used to take pride in the fact that I was your last first kiss.” He glanced over at me sadly. “But then the whole Kane thing happened.”
There would have been a time when I would have apologized for it, but honestly?
The truth was that I wasn’t sorry, and I wouldn’t have taken it back if I could have.
“It doesn’t mean I love you any less, Rhys,” I said softly.
“And the logical side of me knows that,” he replied quietly. “It’s just that being your last mate always made me feel sort of special, you know?”
“I get it,” I replied with a nod. “But you should know that you’re still special to me. It doesn’t matter what order I became mated to each of you in. Every single one of you has a special place in my heart.”
I was pretty sure that was why it was so hard for me to choose. I was afraid that by giving my heart to just one of them, it would never be complete again.
“I always thought you would have made a decision by now,” Rhys said. “Last year, I mean, I thought you’d have chosen Theo by now.”
“I thought so, too,” I admitted. My eyes found Theo as he shot darts at one of the game stands. As he flexed his strong arms, he, of course, hit every single balloon with a ridiculous amount of precision.
Last year today, I was pretty certain I would choose him.
When Milos had lured me into the woods that day, convincing me that he was Theo, I was positive that my mind was made. I planned to make my decision, once and for all.
And then last summer happened. Kane happened. And everything changed.
“What do you think you’re going to do?” Rhys asked me.
I glanced over at him. “Time will tell, but right now I just want to enjoy the fact that my junior year is over. My third years has been, by far, my hardest, so this feels like something worth celebrating.”
“I know it was a rough year, but it looks like you’re going to graduate at the top of your class,” Rhys said. “That’s silver lining, right?”
“I guess.” If graduation even happened. War was coming. That much, we knew for