all. It would have been so much easier if she didn’t have to see him face to face, see him looking so darn sure of himself.
Even in a pair of dark denim jeans which hugged his hips and a V-neck charcoal sweater he’d thrown over a tee shirt, Daniel looked elegant and composed.
She closed the door behind him, thinking this wasn’t what she’d planned on. She’d never wanted a fling in the first place though she’d thought she could handle it. She certainly didn’t want to live with Daniel and have his babies, knowing full well it was nothing more than a temporary arrangement until someone else took his fancy. And she sure as heck didn’t want his money.
So why did he make her melt on the inside? How could he still have this power over her?
He was everything she wanted and he was nothing at all.
Kate sat at one end of the sofa and Daniel at the other.
“I can’t let us finish it this way,” he said. “It’s not good enough for me or for you.”
She looked straight ahead. “I don’t see how we can work this out. We want two completely different things. We always have.”
“What we want is not that different. I think you want me as much as I want you, Kate.”
He wanted her. But that would never be enough.
Longing gnawed away at her, eating into the pit of her stomach.
She knew why it hurt so much. She’d known all along. The first night they met, he’d called it chemistry but love was more than that. So much more powerful.
Damn it, this would be so much easier if she didn’t love him.
But she did.
She reminded herself that if nothing else, she knew what she didn’t want. And the only things he was offering would cost her too much.
Her self-respect was worth more than that.
“That first night I met you, I told you I wanted marriage and a family,” she said. “You didn’t want a relationship. You wanted a fling and we had one.” She shrugged. “Now you want more. A lover. Someone to bear your children. Someone who’ll be happy to hang around and make the most of things while they last. That’s not me.”
She sounded so composed. More like she was talking about an architectural brief than the most intimate relationship of her life.
Still, she didn’t look straight at him. She couldn’t.
Through the corner of her eye, she saw Daniel lean forward. “I’ve asked a lot of you and it’s always been about me and what I want. I’m willing to bend a little now. I don’t want to lose you. Kate, I can’t live without you. I’ve been thinking about marriage and maybe you’re right. Maybe it’s not such a bad idea after all.”
A nervous laugh escaped her lips. “They are probably the least romantic words I’ve ever heard you say.”
“I guarantee you, when I propose to you, they will be the most heartfelt words you’ve ever heard. I wouldn’t talk to you this way if I didn’t mean it. I haven’t even thought about marriage for the last ten years but I’m thinking about it now. I’m thinking about you.”
“I don’t want to force you into marrying me.”
“No one can force me into anything. Not even you.”
Kate shook her head. “This is never going to work.”
“I’ve made a mistake but I can be the man you want me to be.”
She stared down at the rug. “No. That’s the one thing you can never be. It’s been all wrong from the beginning and I’ve been lying to myself. I can sleep with you, have a fling with you. But I can’t be with a man like you for the rest of my life.”
“A man like me? What does that mean?”
“You’re not honest.”
“What the hell brought that on?”
She turned and looked him in the eye. Felt a pang deep in her gut. His dark eyes looked so warm, so full of compassion. They didn’t look like the eyes of a liar, but she knew better.
She had to get this over with.
“You’ve got your own set of standards,” she said. “It’s all about you and what you want. It’s not about integrity and honesty and what’s right. I’ve always known that’s the case but I pushed it to the back of my mind, tried not to think about it. I can’t do that any more. That’s what makes you the wrong man for me.”
“How can you say that? From the first night I met you, I