Gisa chatters on about everything she’s learned in the past week. She likes the guide, and I think Bree does too, in more ways than one.
My mind wanders, as it usually does in these small moments. Drifting back through memory, and forward too. We’ll return to the Montfort capital in a few weeks. I wonder how different the world will be by then. It was already unrecognizable when we left. Evangeline Samos, of all people, was living in Ascendant, last I heard, as an honored guest of the premier. Part of me still hates her, and her family, for all they took from us. But I’m learning to live with the anger, to keep it close without letting it eat me alive.
Slowly, I touch the stones pierced along my ear, naming each one in turn. They ground me. Pink, red, purple, green. Bree, Tramy, Shade, Kilorn.
I couldn’t stay, I think again, for the thousandth time. I still don’t know if he’ll wait for me.
But maybe, when I go back . . .
My fingers brush the last earring, the newest. It’s another red gem, red as fire, red as my blood.
I will go back.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
People keep asking what it feels like to finish a book series, and I keep telling people that I’m waiting to feel something. I thought the experience left me numb, but the sensations of something are creeping up. Relief, of course. Anxiety. Fear. But most of all, gratitude. So much gratitude I can barely even make sense of it.
My deepest and most sincere thanks go to my family, for making the beginning, middle, and end of all this possible. It’s easy to look back and see the moments where my life changed, and you were integral to each. Thank you to Mom, Dad, and Andy, to the Aveyards and the Coyles, for everything you’ve done for me, and will continue to do.
I refuse to get sappy or emotional while thanking my friends, largely because they won’t tolerate it. Thank you to Morgan, Jen, and Tori for making sure I never get in too deep. Thank you to Bayan and Angela, to Natalie, to Lauren, to Alex. Thank you to all the rest, too many to name. We’ve been going to the same party for seven years and that is in no way depressing.
Indy is a dog, so this is kind of useless, but thank you. You’re the best girl. I love you more than is socially acceptable or psychologically healthy.
This series has occupied almost six years of my life, and landed me a career I used to dream about. And the books themselves would not exist without some tremendous people who pushed us both along. Thank you to Christopher Cosmos, Pouya Shahbazian, and Suzie Townsend for sparking everything, no pun intended, and keeping this train rolling as smoothly as it can. Thank you to Jo Volpe, Kathleen Ortiz, Veronica Grijalva, Sara Stricker, Mia Roman, Danielle Barthel, Jackie Lindert, Cassandra Baim, Hilary Pecheone, and the rest of the dynamite team at New Leaf Literary. Thank you to Sara Scott, Max Handelman, Elizabeth Banks, Alison Small, and all the heroes of Universal Pictures and Brownstone Productions. Thank you for loving these books as much as we do. All my love to the army at and HarperTeen, doing battle for Red Queen for so long. Thank you to my fearless, ferociously talented editors, Kristen Pettit and Alice Jerman, as well as Jen Klonsky, Kate Morgan Jackson, Erica Sussman, and every person who ever put a fingerprint on an Aveyard manuscript. You’ve made these books what they are. Thank you to Gina Rizzo, who has now successfully guided me through four years of festivals, tours, interviews, and too many airports to count. Thank you to Elizabeth Ward, Margot Wood, Elena Yip, the Epic Reads crew, and all the geniuses behind the Red Queen campaigns over the years. Never thought I’d have a foam sword with my book on it, but here I am. And of course, thank you to Sarah Kaufman for turning what I saw in my head into the most beautiful and iconic covers any author could ask for.
I’ve been lucky enough to gain some friends out of my excellent colleagues. You’ve all been wonderful support in what is a truly weird career. Love and thanks to my Patties, Susan Dennard, Alex Bracken, and Leigh Bardugo, for sharing their friendship, talent, and advice. To Renee Ahdieh and Sabaa Tahir, stars from the start. To Veronica Roth, a beacon. To