thinking about giving it up for adoption or having an abortion. I want her to keep it. I don’t know what to do,” I tell him honestly. The first thing I did in handling this whole thing was terrible. I want to make it all right.
Lincoln takes a sip of his Coke and I shake my head at him. Now that I think about it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him have a sip of alcohol. Maybe it’s a no alcohol during the season kind of thing? “Just be there for her. Whatever she decides. Remember that this will affect her more than it will you,” he says, interrupting my thoughts.
I nod. I hadn’t thought about it that way. I mean, she’s the one who will look visibly pregnant. The one whose body will change. The one who, if she chooses to keep it, will have to carry it around for nine months. All these thoughts come to mind while I down the rest of my beer. I’m not planning on getting drunk anytime soon, the last time was a bit of a wakeup call, but I definitely gotta have a buzz for this conversation. I can’t just talk about feelings with a guy without there being some alcohol involved.
Another thought comes to mind and, before I can shut it down, I speak. “It’s my kid too,” I tell him. “Shouldn’t what I have to say matter?” I ask.
“I’m sure it does. I’m sure she listened to what you had to say. I can assure you she’s mulling it over. This isn’t easy for her. It’s not easy for you either but you need to understand that the ultimate choice is hers.” He’s right. She was listening. She told me she would take everything into consideration when making a decision.
I look at Lincoln, surprised at how much he knows. The maturity in his words is surprising for a guy who just started college. I mean, I should be ashamed that I came to an eighteen-year-old for advice. “How do you know so much?” I ask.
“Life experience,” he responds, finishing his drink.
“You’re only eighteen, what could you have possibly experienced?” I ask.
“More than you know,” he says, and the look in his eyes shows me that this isn’t something he wants to talk about. Fine by me, I’ve got enough problems of my own right now to force someone to tell me about theirs.
25
NICK
I wake up to the sound of my alarm. It’s 5 am and I have to be at the gym. I don’t know why going this early seems like a good idea. Oh right, because I have classes to go to too. It’s hard being a football player and a scholar. Probably why my grades aren’t the best. I roll out of bed and stop the alarm on my phone. The brightness feels blinding and, when my eyes finally adjust to it, I see an incoming text message from Lincoln.
Lincoln: Can you pick me up for the gym? My girlfriend took the car last night.
I realize that the message came in last night. I guess I must’ve fallen asleep earlier than I thought or maybe I just stopped paying attention to my phone when I realized Amelia wasn’t going to be texting me any time soon. I can’t blame her for it though, she has a lot on her mind. I just wish she’d talk to me about it all, let me help.
Me: Still need a ride?
I ask, wondering if he got one of the other guys to do it for him. I’m about to set the phone on the sink when it buzzes again.
Lincoln: Yeah, that’d be great.
Me: Okay, I’ll be there in fifteen.
Lincoln: Don’t you need my address?
Me: I know where you live.
Lincoln: I won’t even ask how.
Me: I know everything, dude.
I figured out where he lived the moment I knew he was replacing Colton and refusing to live at the Football House. Back when I thought he was just an ass. I’ve learned to understand his decision over time, and it was around the same time I started seeing Amelia. I guess being at her place so often made me realize why it wouldn’t be such a terrible idea to live with a girlfriend. My mind wanders but then I look at the time and begin rushing through my routine.
Twenty-five minutes later I pull up in front of Lincoln’s house. I’m about to text him when I look out the window and find him