I moved my fingers to the waistband of his briefs and pulled them down, freeing his erection.
As I slowly stroked him up and down, I could feel that pressure building at the base of my spine again, the desire to take more, to demand more from him. But I did my best to lock that down too and focused on the silky-smooth feeling of him in my hand.
I looked up at him. He was looking down, but he wasn’t watching my hand; he was watching me, his eyes boring into mine, the emotion swirling there incomprehensible. I kept eye contact as I leaned forward and took him into my mouth.
His eyes narrowed, hooded; his lips parted on a sigh.
I loved every fucking second of it. I loved watching Alec give in, let go of some of that fear and self-loathing and just feel good.
It was my hands, my mouth making him feel good, making him let go.
I took him deeper into my mouth, swirling my tongue around the tip as I pulled away. One hand stayed at the base of his cock, the other at his hip as I set a steady rhythm.
He groaned, his breathing coming in pants. After a while his hips started making little involuntary jerks, and I knew he was close. But I refused to let him have any control.
I released him from my mouth and squeezed his hip to get his attention. He looked down at me, a hint of surprise and a little fear in his gaze.
“Don’t move,” I whispered, an inch away from his throbbing hardness. My eyes were challenging. “I am in control here. Understand?”
He nodded and bit his bottom lip.
I nearly groaned. I knew what it felt like to have those teeth biting my lip.
Once again, I took him into my mouth. He sighed, the sound pure ecstasy. I heard light scraping as he tried to grip the bark.
As Alec dug his nails into the tree, I dug mine into his hip, reminding him I was in charge. His breathing had become completely erratic, moans and groans escaping his mouth more and more often, eliciting my own sounds of pleasure.
My lips were starting to go a little numb from the constant friction, but it wasn’t long before he released a guttural sound and came in my mouth. I swallowed it, gagging slightly as I wasn’t prepared, then stroked him gently and sat back on my heels.
I rested my head against the tree and sighed. Above me, Alec was shaking lightly through the aftershock of his orgasm.
I stood slowly and pressed a kiss to his chest, letting his trembling arms box me in. When my lips touched his skin, he dropped his arms and wrapped me in a hug.
“Maybe you should sit before you fall down,” I whispered into his neck, smiling.
“No.” He nuzzled into my hair. “I have a favor to return.”
He dragged his rough hands down my sides, then cupped my ass over my jeans.
I leaned away and put that serious look back on my face. “No. I don’t want that from you today.”
His brow furrowed in clear confusion and hurt. I realized I’d echoed the cruel words he’d left me with in Tyler’s study, just after he’d driven me to the brink of ecstasy and not allowed me to return the favor.
“I want everything from you, Alec.” I injected as much conviction into my voice as I could, saying the exact opposite of what he’d told me back then. “I want you in every way, and I don’t know why you think I don’t. But this is about me proving to you I have control. I have control over my Light and my desire. I’m aching for your touch. You have no idea how hard it is to say no, to remove your amazing hands from my body.” As I spoke, I grabbed his wrists and took his hands off my ass. “But I’m going to walk away now to prove to you I can. I have just as much self-control as you, Bond be damned.”
For a few seconds, I took in the stunned yet hopeful expression on his face, then I kissed him on the lips once, grabbed my sweater, and pulled it back on as I walked away. I made my point and left him there, his dick hanging out, shocked but satisfied and, hopefully, convinced.
The thumping bass from the house reminded me there was a party still in full swing, and I headed in search of