her arms squeeze, the more my chest tightens until it’s almost painful. I try to let the empty stretch of highway, the wind roaring past, and the sun beating down on my back cleanse my mind from the thoughts trying to break through. Of the ghost who won’t ever leave me alone. It’s so fucking hard, though, when she won’t stop screaming at me.
When the struggle to keep her quiet becomes too much, I pull off onto a service road, cut the engine, and hit the stand. Neither of us moves. Even though the bike is still, my mind continues to whirl at 100 mph.
Shelby shifts behind me, but I don’t turn around. I can’t seem to pry my fingers off the handlebars.
It’s her quiet sniffling that gets my attention.
She’s drawn her knees up onto the seat, and her head rests against them. The big black helmet still covers her face. It pisses me off that she’s always hidden. Hidden behind too-big clothing, behind closed doors, behind Elias. I reach over and pull the damn thing off her head.
She startles, shooting up into a sitting position and dashing away the tears on her face.
“What’s wrong?”
She looks me directly in the eyes, letting the rest of the tears fall. “I forgot what it was like to feel alive.”
Fuck.
Eviscerated.
“Are you warm? You’ve got a heartbeat?”
Shelby nods.
“Then you’re alive.”
“But I’ve been cold and numb for so long.”
“You and me both.”
My jaw clenches, and I look away in shame. I didn’t mean for the words to slip out. Something about this woman tears my guard down without me even realizing it. Her presence is gasoline, and her words are the match. She opens her mouth, and all my barriers go up in smoke.
“Why are you so cold?” Shelby asks as the warmth of her hand lands on my knee.
Both our eyes drop to the point of contact and study it. The tiny trembling hand on the massive, powerful leg. It’s strangely erotic.
“Helmet on. I got shit to do today.”
“Sin.”
“Helmet on.”
“Sin—”
“Get off the bike.”
That got her attention. Her back snaps straight, and her eyes turn fearful. Good. She should fear me.
“No. I-I’m sorry.”
“Get off before I pick you up and make you get the fuck off.”
Shelby scrambles off without another word.
“I told you I’d leave you in the middle of nowhere if you had one complaint.” While she trembles beside the bike, I fish out my phone and scroll to Elias’s number.
He answers on the second ring. “Yeah?”
“Pick her up.” I give him the location and hang up with him cussing my name.
“Elias is on his way, princess. Hang tight and try to stay out of trouble. Or don’t. I don’t fuckin’ care.”
“Please don’t leave me!” she begs, viewing the empty stretch of land around us. “I’ll stop asking questions, just let me go back with you.”
I grunt as I kick up the stand and lift the bike. “Remember that for next time. This is what you get for trusting a bastard like me.”
“Sin, please,” Shelby sobs.
I ignore the remains of my heart as it twists and constricts. The guilt and shame are a thing of the past. This is for the best. She needs to know I’m not a good man.
But I can’t help reaching out before I take off. My palm connects gently to the base of her throat. My thumb on one side of her neck and the remaining four fingers on the other. Her entire body stills at my willing touch. Slowly, I slide my hand upward until I’m cupping her jaw, and I swipe my thumb over her lips. “You’re like a fuckin’ flower. So delicate and sweet. You’ve got to grow in order to turn into that blossom. Then you can try to make people happy and spread that nectar you got inside you. Until you bloom, you can’t help anyone but yourself. Fight for the sun, blossom. Don’t try to share it with me.”
My hand drops lamely, and I take off down the road, leaving her in the dust.
About a mile down the road, I pull over and hide the bike behind a row of bushes. I tell myself to walk, but that doesn’t stop me from jogging back up the hill until she comes back into view. For a moment, I’m struck with fear. What if she isn’t there anymore?
But she is, looking so small crouched in a ball in the distance. She’s probably crying and scared. Definitely alone. Along the side of the road, I find