burned with another wave of tears, but she shook them off. She didn’t have time for any more crying.
It was almost nine o’clock at night, but she couldn’t put this off any longer, nor did she want to. She had apologies to make. She dug through the basket of clean clothes in her bedroom for a pair of yoga pants and a sweatshirt. She dressed quickly, combed out her damp hair, and shoved her feet into tennis shoes.
A half hour later, she found a parking spot in front of Alexis’s café.
The OPEN sign was still on, but the café was empty. Liv pushed open the door and heard Alexis yell from the kitchen. “Be right out.”
Beefcake peeked out from behind the counter and then shrank away again. Liv imagined him teaming up with Howler to plot their next move. She’s back. You run out just in time to trip her, and then I’ll go for the throat.
A moment later, Alexis came out with a beaming smile—which died on her lips when she saw Liv. “Oh.”
The hesitation in her tone sent a chill straight through Liv. There was no easy way to do this. “I’m so sorry, Alexis.”
Alexis froze. The only sign of life was a single blink. But then she swallowed, and without a word, she walked past Liv to the door. Liv winced, expecting her friend to toss her out. Instead, Alexis turned the OPEN sign to CLOSED. Her hand hovered over the glass for a second, a slight tremble visible in her fingers.
She turned around again. Her face had lost its color.
Liv sucked in a breath and let it out. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t a good enough friend that you felt you could trust me with the truth. I’m sorry that I saw the world in such a black-and-white way that I couldn’t see what you were trying to tell me.”
Alexis, inexplicably, sighed and waved her hands. “Stop.”
Liv shook from the inside out. “O-okay.”
Alexis managed a weak half smile. “I owe you an apology too.”
“No, you don’t.”
“I said some unforgivable things to you.”
“I needed to hear them.”
“No one deserves to hear those things.”
Liv took several steps closer to her. “But you were right. I’ve spent so much of my life ashamed of my own weakness that I’ve turned it against people, expected them to live up to a standard I couldn’t meet myself.”
“And I lashed out at you to cover my own shame.”
Indignation on Alexis’s behalf puffed Liv’s chest out. “But you didn’t do anything wrong! Royce is a piece of shit who forced you into this position!”
Alexis laughed softly. “I wish I had it in me to fight the way you do.”
“Alexis, that’s not—”
“You know what, though?” Alexis said, cutting her off. “It’s oddly freeing to have someone know. I’m so fucking tired of living with this.”
Liv’s eyes widened. “You said the F-word.”
“I know. It seemed the appropriate time to do it.”
“I would agree.”
Alexis looked at the ceiling and sucked in a deep breath. She let it out as she lowered her gaze. “I need a drink.”
“Girl, same.”
Liv followed Alexis into the kitchen, keeping her eyes peeled for Beefcake and Howler. They’d been unsupervised long enough to have acquired weapons. Alexis walked to the far end of the kitchen and withdrew a can of Coke from the fridge. Liv laughed out loud when it was followed by a bottle of whiskey.
“Maybe just the whiskey,” she suggested.
Alexis nodded. “Definitely.”
Two shots later, they sat on the floor of the kitchen, their backs pressed to the cold stainless-steel counter.
“My mom was sick,” Alexis said.
“I know.”
“He was offering me all this money, and all I had to do was keep my mouth shut, and suddenly it was like I had a way out. Not just from the harassment or the hell of that job but a way out for my mom. He was offering me enough money to pay off her medical expenses, to give her a real funeral, and—”
She looked around, hands gesturing just wildly enough to reflect the booze in her system.
“To open your own café,” Liv finished.
“To live my dream.”
“There is no reason to be ashamed of any of that.”
“I know that logically. And probably, if I were in your shoes, I’d be telling me the same thing. But it’s different when it actually happens to you.”
“How long did it go on?”
“It started almost as soon as I got there.”
Liv lost her breath. “That was over a year.”
“Yep. A year of complete humiliation.” Alexis’s voice hardened. “A