works.”
After all, he’d been the system.
“He’s served eighteen years,” Zane continued, “stayed out of trouble, done the counseling, worked in the prison infirmary for six years now. The board’s going to consider him rehabilitated. He’s exactly the sort of inmate they want to move out, and I don’t want to put Britt through another hearing. Or any of you.”
“And what about you?”
He’d thought it over, hours of thinking, lying in bed, turning his baseball in his hand.
“It’s going to happen, so there’s no point. And sometimes you have to just close the book.”
“Is that why you resigned from the DA’s office, came back here?”
“Part of it,” Zane admitted. “I don’t have to forget, I sure as hell don’t have to forgive. But it was time to, you know, close the book, open another.”
“Okay. Okay then.”
“Parole’s not a cakewalk.” Zane lifted his beer. “He’ll never practice medicine again. He’ll have to report in, submit to drug testing. He won’t be able to leave the state. They may restrict him to Raleigh, slap him with mandatory anger management. He’ll have to get a job.” Zane shrugged. “He’ll move in with Eliza. She’s got a house, quiet neighborhood, works part-time in a fancy dress shop.”
When Dave lifted his eyebrows, Zane shrugged again. “I felt better knowing where both of them were. Anyway, I’m closing the book, but I wanted to say something to you, something that’ll move right from one book to the next. You’ve been more of a father to me than he ever was. You and Lee, but you as far back as I can remember. You’re the one who showed me by who and what you were, how to be a man.”
Dave took a moment, another sip of beer until he could speak. “That’s a hell of a thing to hear. It’s a hell of a thing to hear from a grown man I’m proud of.”
“What you did for me—”
“Don’t start on that.”
“No, not just that night, Dave, and not just the days after.”
And he needed to say it. Like writing it in a notebook, saying it made it real.
“Not just being there for me when I had nobody, fighting for me. Not just that. For all the time I spent at your house, or around you. You showed me what was real. Real family, real parents, even real husband and wife. Without that, without you … Abuse is a cycle. Without you, I might have become like him.”
“Not in a million years, champ.”
“Can’t know. But the thing is, you, Maureen, Micah, Chloe, you added the weight to the other side of the scale. I’ll never be like him, and that’s the most important thing you’ve done for me.”
“I’ll tell you something back. You were never anything like him, or her. It used to puzzle me a little, how you and Britt seemed so different from them. I knew things weren’t right at home for you, but I never saw what it was. I wish I had, but I didn’t. What I did see? Graham was an arrogant prick, and Eliza, kind of a polished-up void.”
“Jesus, that’s good.” After a breath, Zane took a pull on his beer. “That’s good. ‘Polished-up void’ is exactly right.”
“You and Britt? Just nothing like that, not the way I could see little bits of me and Maureen in our kids. Just little bits. Not even little bits of them in the two of you. What I saw in you? Heart. Neither of them had any.”
Those clear, kind eyes held Zane’s. “I don’t forget either. I don’t forgive.”
“Then it looks like we’re on the same page of the new book.”
Dave smiled at him. “Looks that way. How about we order ourselves some of those loaded nachos and another beer?”
“Sounds good.”
* * *
On a morning of April showers, Zane met Nathan Grandy at nine sharp when Maureen escorted him and Ashley into his office for their consult.
They looked, to Zane’s eye, like a really upscale toothpaste commercial. Both of them blond, blue-eyed, and seriously attractive, Nathan stood gym fit next to Ashley’s blooming pregnancy.
As soon as Nathan settled Ashley in the chair facing the desk, he stuck out his hand. “It’s really nice to meet you. I’m going to say I’m also really glad things didn’t work out between you and Ashley.”
“Nathan Grandy!” came Ashley’s laughing protest.
“Can’t blame him.”
“I heard you were in our place a couple nights back. Sorry I missed you. I think I must’ve headed home right before you came in. Ashley’s getting