loving couple. It hurt that we weren’t.
Looking away from her, I turned back to the screen to listen to that beautiful heartbeat.
Not long later, we left with an envelope filled with scan snapshots that we could share with our friends and Jack’s family. Rosalie was itching to meet me, and Jack and I were putting it off because we didn’t want to deal with any questions about why we weren’t together. I knew neither of us could put off that meeting much longer.
“March,” Jack said. It was the first word either of us had uttered since leaving the hospital.
“Yeah.” Our baby was due March 1. I was definitely twelve weeks along. I clutched at the envelope with the images. “We’re going to be parents, Jack.”
“I know, Em. I still don’t think it’s fully hit me. I’m getting there, but …”
“It hit me harder, hearing the heartbeat … But I know what you mean. I don’t think it will fully hit us until the little one is here.”
“Yeah,” he agreed. And then he said, “You’re right.”
I looked at him and he flicked me a remorseful look before turning his eyes back to the road.
“You’re right, Em. I have made decisions for us both without taking your opinion into account. I never even thought about it like that. I just … you have to know that wasn’t me being a controlling, bullying bastard.” He glowered, but I knew it wasn’t directed at me. “I’m not my father. I thought I was protecting you.”
Sympathy and exhaustion hit me at the same time. “Jack, I know you’re not your father. That’s not what I meant.”
“I know. But I need you to know that it came from a place of good. Pushing you away … I did that for you. If I’d made those decisions for me, we would’ve been together a long time ago. I was trying to be unselfish, and protecting you is just something my instincts scream at me to do. But somehow, I’ve ended up being high-handed. I’ll stop doing that. If you want to come to the trial, then that is absolutely your prerogative.”
Relief flooded me. It wasn’t the first time Jack had admitted when he was wrong and vowed to do better. And he’d proven last time that he meant it. “I do. I want to be there for you. You’re my friend.”
His hands tightened around the wheel. “Yeah.”
This need for him to assure me that he wasn’t his father bothered me, though. For weeks, I’d been concerned that my decision not to be with Jack because I didn’t trust him romantically was still causing him to think he wasn’t worthy of trust, period. I’d known that when he suggested we spend time together because I had to learn to trust him if he was to be the father of my child. I’d agreed at the time, but afterward, it bugged me that he thought I wouldn’t trust him to be a good dad.
“Jack?”
“Yeah?”
“You know you’re a good man, right?”
He frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, I know you’re a good man. Cooper knows. Jess. Your mom and sister and brother and uncle. Everyone who matters knows you’re a very good man.”
Jack flicked me a soft look. “Okay.”
“But do you know that? Do you feel that?”
Understanding crossed his expression. He let go a long exhalation before he replied, “I’ve had a lot of time to think about it these last few months. Despite my past concerns, I know I’m not my father. If I were my father, I wouldn’t have been miserable living the life he wanted for me. I’ve made mistakes. A lot of them. But I know I’m a good guy. I know my intentions.” He cut me another look. “But if you know that … then why don’t you trust me?”
Despite the topic of conversation, I hadn’t been expecting him to ask me that, nor so bluntly. “It’s not that I don’t trust you—I just don’t trust you romantically.”
“See, that makes no sense to me.”
Hearing his frustration, I knew that words were not enough, that if I wanted him to understand my stance between us, I’d have to tell him the truth. Now. I’d have to open the store a little later than usual, but it was time I told Jack everything. “Do you need to get back to work right away or can you make some time to talk?”
“I’ll make time.”
I smiled nervously. “Then when we get to my place, you should come in. I