overpowering. Even more so than the one that had permeated the house. It made sense. Death was in this room. Clinging to the walls, just waiting to attack Louisa and take the little life left in her.
My throat grew tight at the thought.
Death had always been my shadow.
Even if I wasn’t ill, even if I was in good health, all around me, people tended to perish.
Would that happen to Adam? Would he suffer for knowing me?
Blinking back tears that formed for both Louisa and Adam, I stepped closer to the bed.
The room was made for a little girl, and because money was tight, it had stayed that way, even though it had to have been at least ten years since Louisa was interested in Barbie.
Bright pink walls, and a princess bed complete with gauzy curtains that were draped from the wall and arcing in a cluster like the bed itself was topped by a crown. There was a toy box too and a dresser, but even though they were a girly style, white with fancy moldings—more princess stuff—all the other furniture had been replaced.
Medical equipment, sharps containers, all kinds of things I didn’t understand but that Emma had introduced into her life to save their child, to keep her at home.
Now that I thought about it, the last time she’d gone to the doctor’s, the prognosis had been bad. Was that why she was here instead of at a hospital? Or a hospice, maybe? Was that why Emma had been more unhappy than usual? Because they’d run out of ways to heal her?
Confused, I stepped toward the bed where there was a comfortably worn armchair Emma sat in.
She was, when she wasn’t busy, always in here. Always sitting with her daughter, like she was trying to absorb all the time they’d never have together, merging it into her days.
I perched myself on the side, just looking at the sickly girl.
Leukemia had withered her bones, made her skin pasty and pale. Her hair was mostly gone, wispy remnants that were a reminder of the golden locks she’d once had. Her face was gaunt, her body slender. She looked like death amid the pink hope of a child’s room.
It was obscene, really.
No child should ever have to go through this. No child should—
I closed my eyes.
Life wasn’t fair.
Life took. Death accepted.
I sucked in a breath, then gusted it out. I wasn’t sure whether it was the sound, the whisper of my breath against her, or what, but Louisa’s eyelashes fluttered open.
She stared at me dazedly through light green eyes that looked so vibrant in contrast to the rest of her.
Her eyes were the one bit of color remaining in her, even if they were doped up.
I could see her pain, could see her suffering, and it hurt me. Physically hurt me. Maybe not like she was hurting, but enough to have me reaching forward as I began to scrape my chilled hands together, rubbing with a fierceness that tugged at the skin of my palm. The move wasn’t smooth, it was jerky. Inciting heat where there was none.
‘You’ve a gift, child. You’ve a gift. Don’t forget to use it sparingly. No good comes from taking away what isn’t yours to endure.’
Wasn’t it strange how those words plopped into my mind like she’d said them yesterday? Our skills hadn’t been shared by my mom. But that was the way of it. Not all our gifts were passed from generation to generation.
Just like my mom’s abilities with horses, a key skill in my father’s training business, hadn’t been inherited by me, I’d picked up Nanny’s other talents.
The only trouble was, like with anything, gifts were a muscle. They needed training. And for years, I’d ignored mine. Shoving them aside to be normal, to fit in.
I hadn’t tried to do anything like this since I’d practiced the skill with Nanny, and even then, my gift had been meager in comparison to hers.
The heat in my hands appeared with an abruptness that had me jerking back against the seat. Louisa’s eyes flared wide as she stared at me, the violence of my reaction, and I sensed through the haze of drugs I’d somehow captured her interest.
Or something had.
Her focus was on my hands. It was like she saw something I didn’t.
Nanny said there was a veil between the living and the dead... Had Louisa already crossed that veil? Was that why she could see the energy burning in me?