One, but I was. My stomach slid into my toes, as I asked, "You don't believe in me anymore?" I looked at my feet, too afraid to hear her words. She'd lost faith in me. It felt like there was no air.
Al grabbed my arm and said, "Of course I believe in you," she snapped back to life, and the worried expression slid off her face and was replaced with determination. "I know you'll do what's right. I know you, girl. You have a big heart, but sometimes things happen and there ain't no reason. It just happens. It's the kind of thing that makes sense later if we're lucky.
"There's another war coming, Ivy. The angels and demons will fight. And you'll be the victor - there's no doubt about that. Remember who you are girl. It's what will make you into who you need to be."
Barely able to speak, I replied, "But it's already all laid out. I know who I'll be. If that prophecy comes true, I'll become the vile evil monster that Shannon told me about." My throat tightened as I spoke, "I'll be trapped in Hell." I slumped forward, resting my face in my hands.
"No, girl. That's the part that's up for grabs." I looked up at her confused. "There are staples in the prophecy - things that don't change - but there are still parts that are up to you, even if you win the war - even if you become the Demon Queen."
Swallowing hard, I could barely process what she'd said. There was so much happening, so many things that I tried to avoid, but now they were all crashing together and forcing me to become the one thing I dreaded most - Demon Queen. I didn't know what that meant. How could I possibly be ruler of the Underworld and be a good person? Life doesn't work like that. The wicked are punished and get sent to Hell. My entire life, I tried to be good enough to go to Heaven - but now there was no chance. My destiny was the Underworld - that horrible dark cold place where evil reigns. Swallowing hard I looked over at Al.
She patted my back. "Drop your preconceptions of good and evil. Most of life is lived somewhere in the middle, Ivy. Martis were supposed to be truly good like the angels who made them, but look at Julia. Look what she's done. And Valefar are supposed to be inherently evil like the demons that made them, but look at Collin. There are strange days ahead of us. An old Martis, a Valefar, and the Prophecy One will work together. I've seen it. It's the strangest vision I've ever had." Her eyes dropped before she looked at me. "You can do this."
"You saw me? You saw the vision of what happens to me?" I asked.
She nodded. "I have. I'm proud of you, although I can't tell you why." She had a sad smile on her face. "Just know that I'll be proud of you."
I nodded, not knowing what else to say. My life was being slowly destroyed by angels and demons, and their servants. There was no ideal of normal anymore. Al was one of the only people I could trust. Her words gave me an anchor of hope that I would cling to as everything fell apart.
I didn't want to talk about the prophecy anymore. I didn't want to ask her how I would destroy the world or what would happen to everything. Instead, I skipped to the practical question that had been lingering in my mind, "So this Lorren guy; is he trouble?"
Al shrugged. "I don't know. If he wanted to do something with you, he could have. Obviously he thinks killing you is bad, and that is exactly what the Martis have set out to do. No doubt that no one realizes you gave part of your soul to someone else - someone who's been possessed by Kreturus - although, I didn't detect anything different about him. Is he possessed now?"
"I don't know," I answered through gritted teeth. The pain from my wounds was still intense, but the need to tell Al what happened before Collin returned made me talk through it. "I tried to find out, but I can't tell - I can't tell from the bond or from touching him. I tried a kiss too, and there's no way for me to know." I hesitated to ask the question that was