Torn Page 0,21

didn't have his normal confident stance. He stood like a man shattered.

The need to comfort him consumed me. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and tell him it was all right, but I couldn't. His behavior was too suspicious. Was this a ploy? Was Kreturus controlling him or was this Collin speaking to me? There was no way to know. I should have turned around and walked away. I shouldn't have listened to his words. But I did. It was one of those times where I knew I was doing something wrong, something that would screw me later, but I did it anyway. Compassion is a bitch.

Swallowing hard, I pushed back my suspicion, and said, "Those things did happen. But I didn't die." I reached to touch his shoulder, but withdrew my hand at the last second.

He looked up at me with desperation in his eyes. The expression was haunted. "After everything I did, I lost her. I tried to save her. I tried to stop the prophecy. I tried to keep her safe. But, I lost her anyway. And in the end...I was the one who killed her." Glassy eyes overflowed with tears as he stared vacantly ahead. The pain in his voice was too great. Suddenly it didn't matter to me if he had an ancient demon inside of him, or not. He needed me. He was Collin, completely and utterly in that second. The emotions flowing through the bond revealed everything he said and more. He took the blame for my death. He thought he was the reason I'd died.

Without hesitation, I reached for him. My hand rested gently on his cheek, as I turned his face to look at me. "I'm right here. It's all right, Collin. I'm alive." But his expression didn't change. It was like he locked down his mind to not accept what his eyes were seeing. I took his hand in my mine and pressed his fingers to my heart. "See? My heart's still beating. I'm alive. You didn't kill me."

At first nothing changed. He stared at me with haunted horror, like I was an aberration of his mind messing with him. I kept my hand over his with my heart racing under his touch. His deep blue eyes were locked with mine, and I could see him slowly accepting what his senses were telling him - I was alive. Shock had buried him so deeply in grief that it took him a bit to dig his way out. I stood in front him, silently waiting for the pain to flow out of his eyes and recognition to return. When it did, fear collided with longing. We were so close, and in that lost state, he was himself. There was no way Kreturus would allow himself to be ruled by someone so broken. Very little was penetrating Collin's mind. But, now that he actually saw me and realized that I was all right, well, now what?

He blinked back tears and spoke so softly that I could barely hear him, "The fang sliced you. I saw it."

I shook my head, "But I didn't die. It wasn't your fault. And I healed." I slid my fingers along my neckline just above my hidden scar. "See there's nothing there." Okay, that was a lie. But, he didn't need to know that I was still dying right then. My tank top covered the scar and thin blue line of sapphire serum that was still poisoning me. I took his face between my palms, "I'm alive."

It was in that moment that he allowed hope to penetrate him, and he heard me. Sometimes when things seem too far gone, hope is a fool's dream. And when the human mind passes that point, there is no bringing it back. I flirted with the edge of that line for a year. It was Collin who kept me from falling over the edge. It was Collin who carried my grief with me. And now, I was the one calling him back from the edge. In that moment I didn't care about Hell, demons, or Kreturus. Collin was the only one that mattered. The bond flared to life and filled me with joy, relief, and thankfulness.

Collin's gaze intensified as he realized that I was still alive and in his arms. His fingers clasped the sides of my face, as he lowered his head and pressed his lips to mine, tasting me as if he couldn't believe I was really there.