set when Finn and Cedar left the theater and joined the crowd spilling into the warm August air. The show had been highly entertaining, even mystifying, and Cedar had found herself daydreaming about what life would be like if magic were real, as Finn insisted.
The plaintive strains of Bob Marley accompanied them as they flowed through the throngs of people. “Come,” she said to Finn, taking his hand and pulling him toward its source. A crowd was growing around three young musicians playing “No Woman, No Cry.” Finn moved behind Cedar and wrapped his arms around her waist, bringing their bodies together. Cedar closed her eyes, and together they swayed to the music, wrapped in the night air and the knowledge that, at that moment, they were the only two people on earth. Now, she thought to herself. Now is the time to tell him.
Without warning, she felt a cold wave sweep over her, and Finn stepped away as if she had shocked him. She looked up at him and noticed with alarm that all the color had drained from his face.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, putting her hand on his arm. He jerked away and continued staring off into the crowd, a look of horror marring his beautiful features.
“Finn?” she asked. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
He shook his head, but when he turned back to her, his face had relaxed and his eyes were clear and calm. “I just felt sick all of a sudden,” he said. Then he smiled though it seemed forced to Cedar. “Maybe too much street meat for one day. I think I should head home.” She nodded, and they made their way through the crowd. She watched him carefully. His eyes kept darting around them, and his body was tense, as if ready to fight. She tried to follow his line of vision, and for one moment she thought she saw a bright flash of red quickly disappear around the corner. Then there was nothing. When they reached the door of her apartment, he didn’t follow her inside or kiss her goodnight.
“I’m sorry our evening had to end early,” he said, standing a foot away from her. “It was an amazing day. One I’ll always remember.” Then he turned and walked away.
The next day Cedar went straight to Finn’s apartment after work, only stopping to pick up his favorite takeout curry for dinner. Her stomach was once again fluttering nervously. They would be alone together, with no distractions, and she would be able to share her news. She let herself in, and then stopped short.
It was empty. The furniture was gone; the walls were bare except for the holes where her paintings had once hung. A window was open, and the breeze made a few dust bunnies dance slowly around the floor toward her. In a daze, Cedar walked through the apartment, looking for a note or some indication of what had happened. There was nothing. She stood where the bed used to be and slowly pulled her phone out of her pocket. The automated voice on the other end told her his number had been disconnected. She sent off an e-mail, and felt a bone-deep cold creep over her as she read the immediate reply. No such user here.
When she spoke, her voice sounded hollow, as void as the apartment that loomed around her. “I’m pregnant,” she said. But there was no one to hear.
CHAPTER ONE
Seven years later
Cedar looked at the clock on her computer for the hundredth time, and then started shutting down files. She took one last glance at her e-mail and was about to shut that down too, when the message popped up on her screen: Just got revisions from the client. Need you to make these changes before you go home.
So close. Cedar was a graphic designer at Ellison Creative, one of the top marketing firms in the country. It was a demanding job, but a solid one, and she figured stability was worth a little overtime. She sighed and started opening files again. An hour later, she finally packed up and left the office. She picked up Eden’s favorite pizza on the way home, thinking it might soften the blow of being late. Again.
“Hey, I’m home!” she called as she opened the door to her downtown condo.
“Mummy!” squealed Eden as she rushed to greet her. Cedar set the pizza on the counter, and lifted her daughter up into her arms. Eden was small for her age, all fine