as if he’d been south recently. Hans thought they must pay these UPS guys pretty well.
“Are you Hans Larsen?” asked the man. His voice had a British accent, or maybe Australian—Hans could never tell them apart.
Hans nodded. “That’s me.”
The delivery man handed him the box. It was a cube about a half-meter on each side, and it was surprisingly heavy—as if someone had shipped him a collection of rocks. Once his hands were free, the man reached down to his waist. A small electronic receipt pad was attached to his belt by a metal chain. Hans turned around to set the box down.
Suddenly he felt a painful jolt at the back of his neck, and his legs seemed to turn to jelly. He collapsed forward, the weight of the box pulling him in that direction. He felt the flat of a hand in the center of his back pushing him down. Hans tried to speak, but his mouth wouldn’t work. He felt himself being rolled onto his back by the delivery man’s boot, and he heard the outside door clicking shut. Hans realized that he’d been touched with a stunner, a device he’d only ever seen on TV cop shows, robbing him of muscular control. Even as this sank in, he became aware that he was peeing his pants.
He tried to yell, but couldn’t. The best he could manage was a faint grunt.
The tall man had moved well into the house now, and was standing in front of Hans. With great effort, Hans managed to lift his head. The man was doing something to his own belt now. The black leather along the left side flopped open, revealing a long, thick blade that glinted in the light seeping in around the living-room blinds.
Hans found his strength returning. He struggled to get to his feet. The tall man pressed his stunner into the side of Hans’s neck and held down the trigger. A massive electric shock coursed through Hans’s system, and he could feel his blond hair standing on end. He collapsed onto his back again.
Hans tried to speak. “Wh—wh—”
“Why?” said the tall man, in that accented voice. He shrugged, as if it all was of no importance to him. “You made someone mad,” he said. “Real mad.”
Hans tried to get up again, but couldn’t. The big man slammed a boot into his chest, and then in one fluid motion brought the knife up. He grabbed the front of Hans’s trousers and cut them open, the sharp blade easily slicing through the navy-blue polyester. The man winced at the ammonia stench. “You really should learn to control yourself, mate,” he said. Another couple of quick cuts and Hans’s underwear was in tatters. “Guy’s paying an extra twenty-five thousand for this, I hope you realize.”
Hans tried again to scream, but he was still dazed by the stunner. His heart was pounding erratically.
“N—no,” he said. “Not …”
“What’s that, mate?” said the tall fellow. “You think without your johnson you won’t be a man anymore?” He pursed his lips, considering. “Y’know, maybe you’re right. I’d never given it much thought.” But then he grinned, an evil rictus showing yellow teeth. “Then again, I’m not paid to think.”
He wielded the knife like a surgeon. Hans managed a gurgling scream as his penis was lopped off. Blood spurted onto the hardwood floor. He struggled again to get up, but the man kicked him in the face, shattering his nose. He touched Hans once more with the stunner. Hans’s body convulsed, and blood geysered from his wound. He collapsed to the floor. Tears rolled down his face.
“You might bleed to death as is,” said the man, “but I can’t take any chances.” He leaned in and slid the knife’s long edge across Hans’s throat. Hans found enough strength and muscular control for a final scream, the timbre of which changed radically as his neck split open.
In all the flailing around, Hans’s severed organ had gone rolling across the floor. The man nudged it closer to the body with his toe, then calmly walked into the living room. Canada A.M. had given way to Donahue. He opened the cabinet next to the TV, found the slave recorder hooked up to the security camera, took out the little disk, and put it in his hip pocket. Then he headed back to the entryway, picked up the box full of bricks and, taking care not to slip on the hardwood floor now slick with an expanding pool of blood, headed