Ask him to give you money. Whatever.”
I shake my head. “I don’t think any of that will be necessary.”
“The option is there,” he promises, lying down on the bed and pulling me down with him. “You can’t choose your parents, unfortunately. My dad walked out on us all, and my mom died of an overdose. In front of us. So I get it.”
“What?” I whisper, my heart breaking for him. “How old were you?”
“About five when Dad left, and ten when Mom died,” he admits. “It was just me and Trade after that, and we took care of each other as much as we could. We got put into foster care.”
“I’m so sorry,” I say, kissing his cheek. “No wonder you’re so tough.”
He’s been through so much, and from such a young age. I don’t know what I’ve done for him to let me in, but I feel special that he’s done so.
“I’m always here for you, too,” I say, wanting him to know that this loyalty is a two-way street.
We lie like that together, just cuddling, until we both fall asleep.
I don’t know how he always makes it feel like it’s all going to be okay, but he does.
And I’m thankful for it.
Chapter Eighteen
I wake up feeling much better, and also a little embarrassed by my display of weakness last night in front of all the men. I was just so upset, I couldn’t have contained it even if I tried. I know they won’t hold any of it against me. It’s just hard to face people who saw you in such a weak moment.
When I tell Temper this, he says, “Babe, you have no reason to be embarrassed. And trust me, the only thing they will be concerned about is you and if you’re all right. No judgment in these walls, I promise you that.”
First of all, he called me babe, which is cute, and secondly he’s right, because as soon as I emerge from the room, all I get is love. Crow hugs me and tells me he’s here if I need him. Saint, Dee and Renny come over and ask me if I’m okay. Skylar and Izzy bring flowers, chocolates and wine, and even Chains hugs me, and whispers into my ear, “I know where we can hide his body.”
There’s no judgment and no grudges held over my outburst. It honestly seems that no one cares who my dad is or what he does; they only care about me, and who I am, and it’s such a nice feeling to know that.
I’m enough here.
And they have my back when I need them.
In this moment I can see why the men wanted to join the MC, and why the women love these men so much and stay here, loyal to them, even if on occasion it means that they have a target on their back.
It all makes sense why people choose this life.
Temper’s right, you can’t choose your family, but you can make your own, and that’s exactly what they’ve done here.
And somehow I’ve become a part of it.
I don’t know how it’s happened, but I have, and now I don’t want to get out of it. I don’t want to leave.
“Maybe I should send him a message or something and tell him I’m here because I want to be and to stop looking for me,” I say to Temper, out of nowhere, my mind unable to let this whole Palmer thing go.
We’ve realized Mom called him after the first shooting, so I know the mercenaries aren’t connected to him, but I don’t want him to bring on any more trouble to the club on my behalf. They have enough on their plate right now.
“I don’t know if that will work,” Temper admits, glancing up from his phone. “He might think we made you do it, who knows? But we can try it, if that’s what you want to do. Do you want to speak to him, though? If you don’t, we can always handle it for you.”
“No, this is my problem,”