of you did over the past few days, Andrew spent his time hunkered down and avoiding the cold. Only he wasn’t alone. That’s right, ladies. Andrew is officially off the market, rescuing the lovely Lorelei as they were caught in the winter storm at her house. And when the power’s out, there are only so many ways to stay warm.
“The notorious Cortell brothers?” I asked.
“What?” he shrugged. “This town only has any form of entertainment because we create it.”
“That’s not something to be proud of.”
“I am,” he said, as if it was his shining moment on stage.
“Why the fuck would you put that on the page?”
“I don’t know. Why would you assume that Sofia was a gold digger?”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “You know I love her. I’ve apologized. You didn’t need to do this.”
“I didn’t need to, but it sure was fun. Besides, I posted it before the whole hostage situation at the grocery store. Had I known that was going to happen, there wouldn’t have been a need for this.”
“There wasn’t a need for it anyway,” I growled. “So, this is why I’ve been having people come up to me and ask questions,” I said to myself.
“You can thank me later, man,” Joe said, slapping me on the shoulder. “When she sees that you guys have made the town Facebook page, she’s gonna be stoked.”
“Stoked?”
He frowned. “Did I use that wrong? Fly,” he said to himself, shaking his head. “No, that’s not right. I’m pretty sure it’s stoked.”
Ignoring his ramblings, I pointed out the obvious. “Somehow, I don’t think she gives a shit if she makes the town Facebook page.”
“Right, well…you can’t please everyone. So, what were you going to tell me about her?”
I sighed, sitting down at the kitchen table. “So, I didn’t exactly meet Lorelei by accident.”
“What, like you sought her out?”
“Sort of.”
“Was this because of Eric?”
I shook my head. “I got a call about this job, and I met this guy in town. He showed me all these things about a woman that kills men…And that woman was Lorelei.”
He stared at me wide-eyed, his eye twitching just like Eric’s did when he got all weirded out. “Wait, you’re telling me Lorelei is a serial killer?”
“No—“
“She’s with my wife right now!”
“Sofia’s not your wife,” I said calmly.
“And you slept with her? What the fuck is wrong with you!” He stood and started pacing the room. “Christ, I thought Josh had problems, but then you run off and start fucking the local serial killer. What the hell is going on in this town? It’s like we’re being overrun by crazy people. I need to call Kat. No, that would tip Lorelei off. I’ll call Corduroy.” He stopped pacing and stared at his phone. “On the other hand, Jack would probably handle the situation better, even if he does hate us.”
“She’s not a killer,” I said loudly, trying to calm him down.
He stopped pacing and turned to me, a frown marring his features. “Wait, she’s not a serial killer?”
“Not that I can tell.”
“Oh, well, that makes me feel better. So, she gives good head or something and suddenly she’s not a serial killer,” he said, throwing up his hands.
“That’s not what I meant.”
“Then what did you mean?”
“Look, I started out investigating her and…trust me, there are definitely some weird things in her past, but it doesn’t add up to her being a serial killer.”
“So, did you ask her about those things?”
I just stared at him. “And how the hell would I do that? Hey, Lorelei, you know I really like you, but when I first talked to you, it was actually because I was investigating you and your serial killer motives. But it turns out, I don’t actually think you’re a serial killer. However, I still would like some clarification on these odd events that happened in your past, so maybe you could tell me what really happened.”
Joe grimaced slightly. “Well, I wouldn’t put it like that.” Sighing, he sat down at the table with me. “Okay, what kind of weird stuff are we talking about? And make it quick. I don’t want Sofia with a serial killer for too long.”
I rolled my eyes and got started. “Well, her mother died in her chair at home. They didn’t have an autopsy done or anything. They just had a funeral.”
“How old was she?” he asked, his brows furrowed in thought.
“Thirty-eight.”
“That’s a little young to just die of natural causes.”
“That’s what I thought too.”
“Okay, what else?”
“Well, her friend Matthew