as well as we do with everyone else. We patch them up and send them on their way and we see them again the next time they hurt themselves. We just don’t have to wear a smile on our faces with the assholes. Look, what I’m saying is, we don’t have to like every patient—or every person, for that matter. We just have to make sure that we help make them better and send them back on their way.”
We headed back into the break room, but just as we reached the doorway, Jenna’s beeper went off. She checked it and sighed.
“I’m needed with a patient.” She paused, giving me a thoughtful look. “Come on, you can help out too. Let me show you how pointless your pity is on some people.”
A chill ran down my spine at her words, but I nodded okay. There wasn’t anything she could show me that would make me believe that someone didn’t deserve pity and understanding, or even respect. People could be shitty human beings—I knew that more than most—but everyone deserved a second chance, didn’t they?
And just because they were bad didn’t mean I had to change who I was, right?
*
The scent of sanitization hung heavily in the air as we passed by several closed doors until we reached one that had a man sitting outside it. He wore a leather waistcoat and blue jeans. A thick metal chain hung from the jeans and jangled noisily as he stood up. He was tall, muscular, and had a strong chiseled jaw that was getting a lot of action as he ground his back teeth together.
“They won’t give him any more pain meds,” he said gruffly as Jenna and I approached, his gaze going briefly over me and then back to Jenna.
“That’s because I told them that he needs to cut back,” Jenna replied without hesitation. “And you’re not helping him by giving him your little extra medicine on the side, so you quit that right now. I won’t tell you again.”
“He’s in agony,” the man bit out, but in fairness he did look genuinely distressed about how much pain his friend was in.
“Listen here,” Jenna said, pointing a gloved finger at him like she was scolding a child, “if you want him to get through this then you have to trust me, trust this hospital, and trust that we know a little more about getting him better than you do.”
I wondered if this big burly man was going to reach up and snap her finger like a twig. He certainly sized her up like he was ready to. But instead, he took a step back and nodded like a scolded child.
“Yes, ma’am,” he mumbled.
Jenna reached out and patted his arm. “I know it’s hard…Gauge—wasn’t it?” He nodded, and she continued: “but he’ll get through this.”
He sighed and sat back down in his seat, throwing one ankle over the other leg’s knee. “Just make him stop fuckin’ screamin’ all day and night. I can’t take it no more.”
It was Jenna’s turn to sigh now, and she glanced back at me and looked like she was having second thoughts about me being there.
“Listen, most of that pain he’s feeling is in his head now, and no pain meds are going to take that away.”
Gauge looked up at her, his eyes sad and round and his hair hanging around his face like curtains that he wanted to close. “So what will? ’Cause I’m not sure how much longer I can sit here listening to him screamin’ like this.”
“Time. Time and rest. And probably a good head doctor at the end of it all to help with the nightmares and stop him from taking his temper out on everyone around him.”
He nodded, his gaze falling to me again like he’d just remembered that I was there. “Who’s this?” he scowled, and I stood up straighter in a pathetic attempt at showing I was just as tough as my godmother. I wasn’t, though. Not even nearly as tough as her, apparently.
Jenna turned to me with a pleased smile. “This here is my goddaughter, Belle. She’s helping me out today.”
Gauge was still eyeing me, his gaze flared with hunger, but there was something cold and distant there too.
“Pretty little thing like you looks like she needs to be shown a good time,” he snarled, his gaze dragging up and down my body. His expression was off, like he was looking at a side salad rather than a woman he wanted