something in his eyes, perhaps I imagined it. Or maybe just wished I saw them for real—unshed tears.
His hand tightened into a fist and landed on the counter beside him. “I can’t be responsible for another person’s happiness, Kat. That’s what sunk me the first time. Letting down all those people. I can’t and I won’t be responsible for your happiness.”
I blinked back my own tears, but they slipped down my cheeks anyway. I refused to wipe them away. “Of course you aren’t responsible for my happiness. But you are absolutely responsible for your happiness. And in your heart only you know how to bring that about.”
I drew in a deep breath and much to my horror, it sounded like a sob. Pressing the back of my hand to my mouth, I turned and left the kitchen, heading to my room. He didn’t stop me.
The minute I hit my bedroom, I knew that there was no way I could spend another night in this house. I just couldn’t. It would hurt way too much. It was bad enough that we were going to have to cross paths at work every day. Maybe once he got his feet wet with the new division, he wouldn’t be around as much. But until then…
No, I had to get out of here. I whipped out my phone and texted Heath and without waiting for a reply, I pulled out my large beat-up camp duffle bag and began stuffing essentials into it. My clothes for the next few days, everyday items I’d need. If Heath couldn’t take me in, then I’d reach out to one of my other friends. Or, hell, I’d dig into my house savings and get a hotel for the next week until I left for Canada.
I went into the washroom and gathered things in there, too. A lot of my items were still packed up from the trip to Napa so that made it a bit easier. I’d try to get back here and grab a few more things before my trip. I’d definitely need my warmer coat, since Autumn had undoubtedly hit the northwest while it was still very warm here.
I was almost done when a shadow drifted across my peripheral vision and I turned to look. Lucas stood filling up the doorway, hands braced on each door jamb.
I zipped up my duffle and straightened, pushing a strand of hair out of my eyes.
His eyes zeroed in on the bag, narrowing. “You’re leaving?”
“I thought it would be best,” I said quietly. “You know, since we’re about to expire, anyway.”
He blinked, his mouth set. He looked like he might protest. “You don’t have to go.”
“I do. We don’t have to pretend anymore. The good thing is that we both got what we wanted, right? I have my green card. You have the job. We should just get back to our real lives now.”
His brow furrowed. “Real lives?”
“Our previous lives, yeah.”
My phone chimed, and I picked it up. Heath’s reply expressed some confusion at my asking if I could crash with him for a few days but he was more than happy to house me. That was all I needed. I typed out a reply and hit send.
Lucas hadn’t moved.
“Where are you going?”
“Back to Heath’s until I have to go to Canada. And after that…” I shrugged. I waited, and he still didn’t move, watching me with those intense dark eyes of his. I glanced down to check that I had everything and caught sight of the flash of diamond on my left hand.
Oh, yeah. Well, damn. I had to give that back now, didn’t I? Shit.
I reached up and slid it off my ring finger, then held it up so he’d see that I was laying it carefully down on the empty nightstand. “Remember to put this away so you don’t lose it.”
No response. He was like a statue. It was an awkward and heavy moment. I looped the handles of my duffle over my shoulder, grabbed my purse and my backpack and headed toward the door.
And him.
And he didn’t move. I stopped short, looking up at him. “Can you step aside please?”
His eyes were full of emotions and unspoken words. They boiled in there like a stew—like a pressure cooker with no outlet.
“Stay,” he said quietly.
I frowned. “But why?”
“Because I don’t want to be that guy who threw my wife out into the street. You can stay here until the divorce is final.”