you’re free, anything is possible.” I bask in the warm memories of spending time with Gareth, Taylor, and Leander.
“Anything?”
I hold her gaze. “Anything. There, I was someone. There, I had a choice. There, I could say no.”
She almost drops the bowl but continues her work. I can hear my words rolling around in her head beneath her flow of dark brown hair. Saying no to our masters was simply not done. The power in that word is immeasurable. To be able to dissent, to refuse? Unheard of amongst the slaves of Byrn Varyndr.
She pulls my arm into her lap to better see her work, and my fingers graze her belly. With a jerk, she pushes my hand away.
“Taura.” I can’t hold back the sadness in my voice, my heart.
“It’s nothing.” She doesn’t look me in the eye.
“Granthos?”
She doesn’t respond. So, yes, that bastard had his way with her. She’s barely seventeen years and already with child against her will. If I had any magic—any at all—I would tear this fine house down on top of Granthos and then shit on the pile where he lay dead.
“It’s okay.” She swipes a tear away with the back of her hand.
“No, it isn’t.” I take her hand in mine. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault.”
It’s not. She’s right. But maybe if I’d been here, I could have stopped it, could have offered myself instead. Because on her own, she had no option but to submit. “No” isn’t allowed.
“Almost done.” She gently removes her hand from my grasp and continues her work.
When she’s finished wrapping my bites, she stands and grabs the basin. Her voice is so low I can barely hear it. “The winter realm is free. Do you think one day—” She chews her lip. “One day maybe all of us can be free?”
Should I lie? Is giving false hope even worse than telling her the horrible truth that no one in Byrn Varyndr will ever be free until the lesser fae and changelings join together and fight for themselves? Because that’s the only thing that can change the way things are. I saw it in the campfires and the legions of soldiers beyond the mountain. They were prepared to shed as much blood as possible to gain equality, even if they were only pawns in Shathinor’s dark game of conquest.
I sigh. “I think we should all take a vacation to the winter realm as soon as possible.”
Her face falls a bit, my deflection enough to snuff out the small flame of hope. I’m sorry for it. But there’s no point entertaining a life free from this place. After all, I was dragged back, freedom snatched from my fingers. They would do the same to her, or worse. And now she has a babe on the way, one that I know she will love despite how it was created, and I don’t know if that makes me sad or happy. Emotions aren’t allowed here, either.
“I’ll return to check those bites in the morning.” She grabs the door handle.
My body will be cold by then. I scoot the small scissors she used to cut the stitching wire beneath me.
“Hey.” I try to sit up, then change my mind when agony tears along my throat.
“Yes?”
“Where’s Clotty?” Clotilde is the oldest changeling on the estate. She serves as something of a surrogate mother to all the human slaves and takes care of the newly-arrived exchanged children. But she is as ornery as she is soft-hearted, and many claim I inherited my sassy ways from her. Nonsense, of course. I’m as sweet as a daisy. “I haven’t seen her wrinkled face since I’ve been back, and she’s the one who usually patches me up. Is she busy with a new exchange or something?”
If I thought Taura’s face had fallen before, this time it’s like a landslide of despair.
“What?” I grip the sheet. “What is it?”
She inspects the splinter-filled floor, but her eyes glitter with tears. “When you escaped, Master blamed her. He said she filled your head with ideas, that she was the reason you had such a poor attitude. When the hounds began to wither, he beat Clotilde, demanded she tell him where you’d gone. She didn’t know. He beat her anyway. He wanted you back so badly that he hired the Catcher, but when he discovered you’d escaped to the winter realm, the Catcher refused to go after you unless Master gave him an easy way in and out.”
I swallow hard. “The portal spell.” I